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BOY PROBLEM
I am a fifteen year old girl and one of my very very best friends is a boy who is sixteen. No. I don't like him. He has always been there for me. He used to be my boyfriends bff but when me and my bf broke up I kind of took him with me... teehee :). Anyway, even when I was dating my ex, my guy friend and I were super close. We tell eachother everything. But I feel like our relationship is sooo weird. Cuz we hold hands and cuddle and I sit in his lap and what not and we flirt with eachother sometimes but we never kiss or anything. We're just really touchy and flirty friends? Haha. But we both like different people. The guy I like right now doesn't really liike the kind of relationship me and my guyfriend have and I guess I can't blame him. I'm not really sure how my ex was ever okay with it... But I dunno, we've always done this. Is it weird?? It doesn't feel that weird to me when we do it but it sounds weird haha I don't know! I wanna make things work with this new guy. He knows I don't like my guyfriend he's just not comfortable with us being so touchy... What do I do? I feel like the touching is just part of our friendship...
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:Edit:
Older people can't help but look down a little bit. We've been around longer, and we know more.
Someday, you'll look back on your life and laugh about how many stupid things you assumed you knew everything there is to know about. This is going to be one of those things.
You aren't a guy. We don't work the same way. There is no way in hell this kid spends that much time around you without attraction forming. It's how men's brains work. And if he's under 20 he's not going to be mature or life experienced enough to do anything but go with it and hide it. Every fifteen year old girl with a BFF who dotes on and cuddles with her thinks she's a unique snowflake and that her situation is exactly as she imagines it.
You're a statistic sweetheart. Sorry. You said the things I said are stupid but the truth is that you've got no basis for saying that, no experience to tell you what's real except your own.
There is something you don't know about him. Either he's gay and hiding it, or he's into you and hiding it. Everything you've said is predicated on the assumption that you would know if he was lying. But you're 15. You don't have a ton of experience with guys to know exactly how guys act or what to look for to tell. You take him on faith because it's all you've got.
Trust it if you want. You'll figure it out sooner or later. Hopefully sooner, cause when he goes unnoticed for a few years he's going to resent you for never being into him no matter what logical justifications you both put yourselves through.
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Hey there,
I totally understand what you mean :) It is totally normal and it is okay if you and your guy friend are playfully touchy/friendly with eachother. But, if your new guy feels uncomfortable or doesn't like you being this way around your friend, then talk to your new guy about it and explain that you are just friends with your friend.
It is okay that you are this way with him, just make sure your new guy understands what is happening. Obviously, your boyfriend (I'll call him) feels that his territory is being intruded by your guyfriend. So, tell him that he is the only one you truly want to be in a relationship with. If he still feels that you are crossing a friendship line with your guy friend, try not to be so touchy around your guyfriend in front of him. Treat him different, continue telling him he is the only one for you and make sure he feels like he is the special guy. Don't ignore your guy friend, but make sure you keep your real loving side to the guy you truly want to be with.
Talk to your boyfriend about it and if he doesn't want to listen, maybe he isn't the right guy for you. Never lose your loving flirty side towards your guyfriends ever (just keep it to a minimum around your real boyfriend). It is what keeps you positive and shows who you really are. Also, it is pure fun and lets you express your emotions! Go ahead and be yourself ;)
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Honestly ive never heard of a friendship like that and i dont think that can honestly be called a friendship it seems more couply and i know you say you two dont have feelings for eachother but if this kind of closeness and touchy flirty thing keeps going on then no guy will be interested in you and no girl will be interested in him because it just seems wierd sorry not trying to be mean or anything but you said it yourself its a wierd relationship what i would suggest is maybe going out try turning your friendship in a relationship more than friendship then it would seem normal and maybe even make you realize you do actually have feeligns for eachother just give it a chance.
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