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Curfew Argument
My parents and I had an argument when I got home from the movies around 9:20. It wasn't different from any other trip with my friends, and I already let her know I was leaving at 8:40. The problem was that my dad usually picks me up, but this time I took the subway home. While I already let my mom know this, she's very overprotective. I had my friend's dad drive me to school, and then took the subway to my house(one station). Most people from where I live take public transportation, and it was filled with people. I got home, and my parents started yelling at me. While I was used to my mom, my dad was especially hurtful. He acknowledged that I didn't do anything wrong that day, but told me to get home by 8 in the future. Since I did nothing wrong, I was very upset. I felt that 8 was too early and I knew my mom wouldn't have cared if my dad had picked me up. I pointed this out, and he started yelling about house rules. (he was already yelling in the first place). The whole fight is too long to post, but basically he started yelling and interrogating me as soon as I walked in, even after it was established that I wasn't in the wrong. I was very calm at first, but I found that by the end I was getting very defensive. My mom told me to go to my room.(to get us to stop arguing) I was crying by that point. My dad followed me in, and he wouldn't stop. He asked me how much money I spent, and what I spent it on. (it was my money, and he never asked before). I asked why he was doing this, and he yelled at me to just answer. I said I didn't know, which was the truth. I hadn't spent much at all, and just bought a little food.He kept asking like he thought I was lying. The argument went on, and at one point he made a threatening advance towards me. He brought all sorts of things on, and told me I couldn't stay up late anymore and all that(while still on the subject, I hadn't said anything else). About half an hour later he came back in and told me not to be too upset(I was still crying) and that it wasn't a punishment or related to today, it was just for the future. Of course to me, it felt like a punishment since he yelled at me and made my curfew 8 and told me I couldn't go out on Sundays and everything. This was all while we had established that I hadn't done anything wrong. My mom and I worked it out quickly (she told me "fine, next time I'll go get you so I feel that you're safe) but my dad got involved for no reason and made everything worse. I'm still fuming about the curfew(which I doubt is going to stay 8). It's two days after, and my dad is trying to make it up to me. I won't speak to him. I just can't get over that day, and how hurt and attacked I felt(especially since I did nothing wrong). During the fight, one of his "suggestions" was that I go to the movies alone. He doesn't understand because he was very poor during his childhood, and never went out to meet friends. He was unreasonable and unfair(and extremely unkind), and I just can't seem to forgive him. His methods of making up are buying presents and things like that, but I don't want a present. I want an apology. Can I have some advice? 13/F
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Even though your angry at your father you can't hold a grudge aganist him forever seeing as he's still your dad you'll have to forgive him at some point if i were you i'd wait for things to settle down between you and your dad and wait for him to
apologize you can't force him to do so it has to come from his heart he has to want to do it so he truely means it and apologizes i wouldn't rush or pressure him give him some time and hopefully he'll come around and give you the apology your wanting both of your parents were being strict with you because they love and care for you 13 is still a young age your still a minor talk to your father and tell him how you feel so he hears what your saying and you get everything all out in the open for him to hear(:
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Oh, I'm sorry you had to go through that.
Just tell him exactly what you said.
"Dad, your methods of making it up to me are buying presents and things like that, but I don't want a present, I want an apology."
You could also bring up that they should trust you not to make stupid decisions. You sould like a smart girl, and you're only thirteen?
Of course. I wouldn't expect them to let you stay out till midnight or something like that. But I think nine or ten is a reasonable hour. As long as your somewhere safe and not roaming the streets.
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