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Personality Change
I'm not sure if this is in the right category... But anyway, I am 21 Female and I hate my personality. I kinda always have!. I have a lot of things wrong with me. I'm lazy, selfish, socially awkward, jealous, geeky, crazy and I let people down easy. I cant tell AT ALL if I am bugging, hurting, offending or embarrassing someone. I cant hold a conversation and I have a hard time starting them. When I have them people usually find me awkard to talk to cuz I dont know how to react. People tell me to be myself and thats who I am so I desperately dont want to be myself. There are tons of ways to change outer appearance, I'm wondering if there are ways to change your personality. I go to Therapy and I have a great therapist but are there other things I should be doing? Are there certain, specific tereatments that can make me fun, cool, loyal, energetic, positive, and just one of those people everyone wants to talk to and be around? I will do anything and money isnt an issue. I need help. Its taking over my life and I just cant take it anymore. Please NO rude comments or anything saying "Just be yourself" "Love yourself for who you are" or anything like that. Thanks
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Want to answer more questions in the Health & Fitness category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Mental health?
hypnosis duh :p lpl
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Well, first and foremost, keep going to your therapist. That would definitely help.
Secondly, have you ever given martial art a thought? While it won't help you change overnight (I don't think there's anyway to do that, except to fake and force it), over a period of time, it would definitely help you become more loyal, energetic and positive--though I am not sure about the fun and cool part.
Judging from what you have described (as far as personality goes), if possible, I suggest you try to practice an art that focuses on join-locking and throwing, rather than one that focuses in striking. A few examples would be something like judo, jujitsu, and aikido. Of course, just go with whatever closest to your home or whichever you like the most.
It would be boring at first since you would need to learn the basics before all, but before you realize it, you would find yourself becoming more and more energetic and positive (as long as you don't quit in the middle, that is). Also don't let your current body built discourage you, martial art isn't just for the strong. Heck, in my local judo dojo, we have 60-year-old+ guys (yeah, no joke, 60+) still going "Hu-Ah!" and "Yah!" here. When I first came in, I kind of thought something along the line of "what the heck are these guys' bones made of?" Hahaha!
So talk with your therapist about it, then go visit a few dojos and talk to the instructors, watch their basics and spars, and decide which one to join. Don't be afraid, because most instructors are very friendly and willing to help enthusiastic students.
If successful, you would improve physically, gain confidence, and it would feel somehow easier to interact with others as well. It would definitely be a fun experience. I definitely recommend you to try it out, if possible.
Good luck,
ThirdQED :-)
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If anyone out there tells you that they can offer you a treatment that will make you fun, cool, loyal, energetic, positive, and just one of those people everyone wants to talk to and be around, and asks for money... they are either scamming you or trying to get you to join a cult like Scientology.
What you should be doing is exactly what you are doing.
Keep talking to your therapist. (Absolutely talk to your therapist about wanting to make more progress quicker too). Keep taking baby steps to make your life what you'd like it to be, and to relate to people the way you want too. Pay attention - to yourself and to others. It's hard work and it will take years. There are no short cuts. There is only working hard at it.
No one can turn you into a different person overnight. No matter how much money you throw at them they can't turn you into Britney Spears or an NBA star.
People don't say 'Just be yourself' because it works - sometimes it doesn't. They say it because you CAN'T be anyone else, and pretending is pitiful and annoying.
You CAN change who you are, but that takes a long time and a lot of work. If that is what you want, you just have to keep at it.
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You pretty much nailed the same situation I'm in, As I am still a work in progress I will give you some pointers that have helped me in the run.
1. The more you socialize, The better you will get at it. You see someone you know, Say "Hey! How are ya" Remember to always smile when you greet someone. (As I often forget to smile) but since I put on a face I've come along way in that category.
People can change, The first step to changing is recognizing the problem. If you are lazy, Do something you wouldn't normally do. If you would rather be a couch potato and watch TV, Instead get up and go for a walk. A 10 minute effort can be a huge step. Socially awkward..I hear you I have been on medication for years for anxiety. However, Like I said above anything is possible to conquer. It may not be an easy process but nothing comes overnight. Therapy would be a great thing to try, I myself am also taking that one into consideration. It will take time, Make yourself a goal.
I hope you accomplish your wishes, Good luck!
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