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Jealousy
My problem is simple. I am an 18 female going into college this fall and I'm jealous of this one girl that my bf of 20 years of is friends with. I too have many guy friends that I hang out with as well. We both love each other very much and we have a healthy relationship. We both spend get time to ourselves, for school, to our friends and other important things so we are not smothered. The problem isn't him, it's me. I am the baby in my family and I know this sounds bad but I think I have this problem since I'm used to getting all the attention. I am not a snotty person but this one girl just really irritates me. My bf has never cheated on me and tells me to trust him. However, I always get mad at him when they hang out, they never hang out alone but I just feel jealous when they are together because she gets to be with him but not me. Other than this, we have no issues. I've had this problem for a long time and it would kill me if I lost him over this one thing. I feel like if I don't stop bitching at him, he will leave me (even though he says I would be the first one to do that). I drive myself crazy over this and I want to just stop and enjoy our relationship instead of freaking out over this girl. She's in the same friend circle as his other friends so she will be around even if I asked him to stop being friends. My point is, there's nothing I can do to stop it, I jsut need help in not freaking out on him and avoiding the whole "i-love-you-dont-worry-i-dont-like-her-and-you-are-my-eveyrhting" talk every time they all ahng out. Help?
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The solution to this is to make friends with the girl yourself. Even if she's not your type, find something you have in common or one thing you like about her and concentrate on that. If you get to know her better you'll feel better about the friendship, and you'll also be able to keep an eye on the relationship. What you see may make you feel a lot better because you'll be able really see the difference between how he treats her and how he treats you. And, at the very least, you may make a new good friend. So let your insecurity go and make the effort to befriend this girl. I think you have more to gain than to lose by doing that. Good luck.
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What i think you should do is become better friends with this girl. Figure out who she is and what she likes to see the common interest in friendship between your boyfriend and this girl. I know how you feel though. Most girls have this problem with their boyfriends friends. I just think you should be calm and if there really is some jealousy ask him to take you with him when you hang out with her sometimes. And if u love him and he loves you, there really shouldn't be a problem. I know jealousy is a big deal but i mean so is trust. If you trust him then you don't want to make a big deal out of this cause then he might think that you don't trust him. So be very careful. But i do think you need to sit him down and tell him how you feel because communication is very important in a relationship. Maybe he feels this way bout one of your friends. You never know. Just stay calm. And now that your going to college and he isn't goingto be with you as much i could assume, get a webcam and talk through them just to be able to keep everything good! i wish you the best of luck =)
~Sealgirl07~
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