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He says he doesn't want us to ruin what we've got by making relationship official?
I have been casually seeing this guy for around a year now. For the first 6 months it was just a laugh like nothing serious but now we are getting quite serious like he tells me his feelings are soo strong for me and stuff. We're always out, tell each other everything and like plans for the future and stuff. But he is geniunely scared of relationships. He was in one for 2 years and he's still best friends with the girl but they constantly argue and stuff and he says he doens't want me and him to ruin what we've got by a relationship. He's never seen a steady one seen as his parents split up, he had been cheated on when he was younger and alot of his friends parents have split up. i think he has alot of trust issues.
Thing is i have really fallen for him, we've been through alot together and alothough we're not actually in a relationship he always txts me random things like "my feelings for you are so strong" or "your an amazing person and i'm so glad with where we are" Last night i told him i love him and he seemed a bit taken aback by it, he said that they are really strong words but i just said thats how i feel i'm not expecting you to say anything back, maybe i shouldn't have said anything, then he said he was glad i did and nothing will change between us.
Does it matter he didn't say it back?
What do you think of our whole situation of not been fully committed?
Sorry it's long
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Don't force him into something he doesn't want. It's hard to turn a friendship into a relationship if he just wants to be friends. Accept it. If he's ready to be in a relationship with you, he'll let you know.
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hes just scared im sorry but he is scared if he get close to a girl in a sensual relationship he might get his heart broken again give him time to come around you will grow on him and he will end up loving you for you. he is just scared so he didnt say anything its ok. i think you should take it slow let him come around at his own time. if you have anymore questions ask me. i'd love to see how this turns out
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I think that as long as you are sleeping with him there's no need for him to make a commitment. Ever hear that saying "Why buy the cow when you get the milk for free?" It is absolutely true. why would he want anything to change? He gets all the benefits of having an awesome girlfriend without having to contribute anything of himself or make any sacrifices in his personal life. He can enjoy having a "girlfriend" without having to have an official commitment, so he's still on the market and free to play the field. I'll bet my house he's sleeping with other women. You've made a mistake letting him use you for so long. If you want to test his feelings, stop sleeping with him. Seriously. You'll learn a lot about how he feels by his reaction. Maybe he'll realize how great your really are and decide to give you the comittment you want, or maybe you'll just stop hearing from you. Either way, you'll know where you stand. But you can't stay like this. You're giving but not getting. That's a surefire prescription for heartache.
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Men are so hard to read. They are not as verbal as us girls, and some have been raised on the belief that "actions speak louder than words. ". But I totally understand why you probably felt slightly offended that he didn't say it back. You just want to know if you're a man's final destination, not just a rest stop along the highway. It seems like he's really into you, though. If he didn't care, he probably would have had a negative response when you said those three words. Instead, he was happy that you did. Maybe its actually a GOOD thing that you were the first to say it. It might have showed him that you really do like him and made him less afraid of commitment. Considering he does have trust issues due to his past, it probably will take him awhile to warm up to the idea of saying I love you..and being committed to an official relationship. Just be sure to support him and always try to prove to him that you won't let him down. Eventually, he will realize how much of a sweet, honest girl you are and will be more comfortable with being more than friends.
Just take your time. It's obvious you guys are very into each other, and its completely normal not to be fully committed right now. And don't regret saying "i love you". I'm sure it meant more to him than you think!
I hope this helped-Good luck with your boy! (:
<3Kristen
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