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and i a friend or ...?


Question Posted Sunday June 20 2010, 4:49 am

ok so i have this mate (male) and he doesnt treat me like other girls.
we text alot.
hugg
flirt
and instead of just hugging me like the other girls he asks "can i have a hug", trys hard to get my attention ect, and its constant.
we have dated b4, and everyone thinks we should go out again , but he says he doesnt like me anymore, even though thats defantly not how he acts.
suggestions???


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gr8fruit answered Sunday June 20 2010, 4:00 pm:
Hey there,
If he doesn't treat you like any other girl and flirts with you, he must like you. If you've dated before, he obviously knows you, respects your space (since he asks before he hugged you), and probably still has feelings for you (when he tries to gain your attention alot). Also, when he says he doesn't like you, he is probably saying 'I am not ready yet for another relationship with you', 'but I do like you', and 'help me figure out what to do' in guy language. I believe this, for you basically said he sends the message he likes you, but doesn't act on it.

There is most likely a lot of questions going through his mind about what used to be between you two. He could just be nervous to ask you again. I believe you like him.. so If I were you I would: tell him how you feel (say 'I really like you still' or 'we should get together sometime' or 'can we be more than friends?'), flirt back with him (compliment him, touch his arm/leg, wink a him, smile at him, and look him in the eyes when you two talk). Let him know you like him and tell him it is alright for him to like you.

If he really doesn't like you, which could be (but isn't likely) the case, still let him know that you like him. Eventually, by hinting then telling him how you feel, he will become open about how he really feels about you and you two should become closer. It sounds as if he knows how he feels for you, he just needs a little help getting the truth out <3

When going to the movies with him, just act normal. Being yourself is the key. If you don't feel comfortable, let him know. If he goes to make a move, let him. When I first went out to the movies with my guy, believe me, I was nervous. But, I let him make his move (touching my knee) and in the end, I was glad I let him. I think he was nervous, then relieved as well. Even if it is kind of scary, if you just go with the flow, it will all work out fine. If he does something that makes you too nervous or uncomfortable, just say 'I'm not ready for that yet' or 'I would like if we took things slower'. If he is a nice guy, he will respect your wishes and everything will still work out <3

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