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Long distance relationship break up.
My long-distance boyfriend and I broke up last friday, a week ago today. We both want to remain friends, but obviously it will take time. I decided what's best for me is no contact for awhile. At least until I'm a bit stronger, and can handle talking to him without crying everytime.
I've been doing okay, the only thing is..I have him on facebook. And he's added loads of new girls, and talks to them constantly, and blah blah. He seems like he's doing completely fine, while I'm struggling. But I'm the one who really wanted the break-up..he wasn't a nice person, and I was finally done with it. But I can't help missing him, we were together for a year.
Will this get easier? Should I keep not contacting him until I feel completely ready..even if that takes months and hes gone by then? Any tips on how not to think of him? I've tried avoiding the computer, obviously, since that's where I spent all my time talking to him. Please..any advice on what to do would really help. Thanks.
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
If your solution to handling the break-up better was to cut-off contact whether it be through e-mail, text, instant message, etc, why did you not delete him off of Facebook as well?
Seems to me like a part of you still wants contact, or at least to keep an eye on him? Delete him off of your Facebook. If no contact is your solution, then that means that social networking websites are included.
I'm positive that this will get easier. It always does. You wanted to break-up, you knew he wasn't a nice person, and you were the one who suggested no contact. Don't get upset because he's adding new girls to his Facebook. He's a single man now, and watching him flirt & make new friends isn't going to make things easier for you. Don't call him, don't text him, don't instant message him, don't e-mail him and don't Facebook him. Delete him from everything you know & move on with your life.
I would definitely suggest avoiding the computer. If you find that a little bit hard to do, just stay away from things that would remind you of him online. Start a blog, play online games, peruse craigslist, shop online, whatever, just stay away from contact with him. If you are definitely wanting to avoid your computer unless when it's needed most, pick up a new hobby. Learn to play an instrument, go see a movie, hang out with your friends, maybe go to a club if you're of age, etc. Doing new things will help get you back out there, and it'll help get him off your mind.
Hope this helps!
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I read a quote one day that said something along the lines of "there's a reason the people from your past didn't make it to your future". If he wasn't a nice person and didn't treat you with the respect that you deserve then you obviously made the right decision and the hardest part about leaving that kind of a relationship is the after effects and staying strong. Negative relationships have a way of keeping people down one way or another, so I think that the best thing for you to do is to continue on without contact from him for as long as it takes you to get over him, regardless of how long that takes. If you've agreed to stay friends you'll find out how good of a friend he really is as well. Maybe you just don't need this guy in your life at all or only from a far distance. Definitely give it more time though, and ignore what he's doing on facebook if anything use it as a reminder for the reasons that you aren't in the relationship anymore. Stay strong, good luck :)
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