|
me and my bf
15/f
Me and my boyfriend have been going out for 5 months. It was completely fine. But I did end up liking another guy. I didn't let that get to me because I know that happens sometimes and I'd rather be with my bf. He is the best to me and actually cares.
But one of my friends, who is one of his friends is really close with me. We talk all the time. He tells me what a horrible boyfriend I have because he doesn't talk to me as much as he did before and that he treats me better than my own boyfriend. Honestly, he is a good friend and all, but its killing me because in a way the things he says is true but I don't want to leave him.
Recently I found out my boyfriend likes another girl too. My friend that I talk to all the time told me. I listened in on the conversation, so it's not like he's lying about it. But I know he doesn't want to get with that girl and he wants to stay with me. I didn't let it get to me since I like another guy. But I started thinking about it and now I kinda feel really hurt. I've been doubting us for a long time and I guess I just tell myself he doesn't care for me anymore because there is someone else.
My friend told me I should break up with him. I'm moving in the summer so it's gonna happen eventually but I don't want to. I really care about him and he swears he loves me. He really proved himself but now I'm so confused.
Maybe I should talk to him?
I would but I'm not even supposed to know he likes another girl.
Please help, thanks!
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
First of all, no you shouldn't talk to him about it because then he'd think your spying on him and not trusting him and that would really upset him. And even if you come to break up with him, you shouldn't even mention that you know he likes someone else or that you listened in on one of the conversations to prove it.
Second of all, it is obvious what your friend is doing, trying to break u up with your boyfriend and build doubts in your mind, so you'd listen to him, which you are doing, and break up with your boyfriend, which you are considering, then he'd make his move in and ask you to be his girlfriend, which you will also agree to. And yes maybe all he's telling you about your boyfriend is true, so its not really wrong what your friend is doing by telling you all this, but here is the thing, your kind of doing the same, i mean, you have your times when you unintentionally fall for someone else, or talk to that mutual friend you both have where you obviously have something going on between you both. So yes it happens, that sometimes you look to someone else or have feelings for someone else, its sometimes more like attraction or admiration or a new temporary phase of excitement, but nothing serious, and you can't judge the person till he actually does something wrong, like cheat on you, or sleep with this person or kiss this person or does something major.
Its obvious that your friend got to you with his words, and maybe part of it is because what your friend is saying is actually true, but unconsciously another part of it is because deep inside you have feelings for your friend, that you don't seem to care much anymore if you leave your boyfriend, and you are considering to break up with him, so you'd share your feelings with your friend.
So basically now, i'm gonna tell you to think about this on your own, without any of your friend's advice or influence on you, and think whether you love your boyfriend ,if you still do, and if you wanna be with him, and if you decide to break up with him, break up cause things aren't the same anymore, or cause you don't love him as much anymore, but not because he might admire another girl or is being nice to another girl,neither cause you might have feelings for your friend, cause you know something, maybe this other girl is a friend to him just like you have that friend of yours, and you probably talk to this friend in a sweet admiring way, and if your boyfriend would listen into your conversation, he'd think the same, but not just cause he didn't,makes him wrong and your not.
Hope i helped, if you need anything else, please be free to contact me. Best of luck :D
]
Hi :)
It is true, sometimes you can be attracted to other people while being in a relationship. Sometimes it's just an infatuation that happens once in a while, but doesn't really mean anything. And on other occasions, you probably are better off getting with that other person. You say that you're moving away for the summer, so you and him will eventually break up. If that's the case, why would you get with the other guy? Won't he be living in the same area as your bf?
I say, if both you and your boyfriend would rather part ways and meet new people, go ahead! Communication is the key. He's probably asking himself the same things you're asking yourself, but is afraid you'll over react or get upset. I think you should talk to your boyfriend about the situation with the other girl he likes, and see where that leads you. If he asks why you are asking, tell him the truth about liking another guy, but not enough to throw away your relationship. You never know what can come out of this. Even though you don't want to let him know you found out, just be honest.
If you guys work it out, and ddecide to stay together. It's okay if you two are mature enough to handle a long distance relationship. I'm no one to judge how mature you are, but I feel that since you're only 15 and you're moving somewhere new, you will find new friends and possibly new lovers. You have a looooong life ahead of you, and you will know when you find the right person. Sometimes it's after the obstacles of confusion, but I think you two should work it out, and see what happens. If you want to be single and do whatever you want, then don't be afraid to make that decision. Good luck!!
Uniq :)
]
More Questions: |