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two year breakup i cant handle, causeing me attacks
my boyfriend and i broke up yesterday which we have been going out for almost two years. i broke up with him because we fight alott and he usually starts it. he cheated on me a bit which i forgave and i think it happened again. for dates i picked him up n i payed everytime. he was controlling over my friends and my appearance and where id go even if he didnt come or if i was alone. although he has saved my life, helped me through trauma rehab, and gave me the best nearly two years of my whole life... my two best friends finally convinced me to breakup two days ago when i texted them cryin so they kept calling and helped me through it and then picked me up and we went out for girl time. i need alot of help copeing even though they help me non stop, i had another attack today which this led up to and i couldnt breathe, because of the pain he causes me. but i dont wana loose him were only takeing a break and i wana stay friends but he wont talk to me unless its in a dick way, yet im the one who broke up with him. please help??
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
First let me tell you that you have done the right thing. However, you really need to see this as an ending, not a break. I know that is hard, but you were being used & that is not a healthy relationship.
He has cheated on you, possibly more than once. You pick him up for dates, pay his way and yours. Even though he is putting no effort into the relationship, he feels he has a right to control who you can be friends with, what you can wear or look like. Those are all big red signs of an abuser. You do not deserve that.
You deserve a guy who puts you first and treats you to a good time. One who doesn't try to control who you talk to or hang out with.
Its great he helped you through a rough rehab. But you don't owe him your life for doing so. If he is using that to guilt you into things, that isn't right and also abusive. People who help others don't expect to be rewarded. So don't feel guilty or like you owe him loyalty.
Don't bother trying to talk to him or try being friends with him right now. Don't cry to him and allow him to talk to you like this whole thing is your fault. Thats the last thing you need. Go out with your friends, have fun. Find another guy. You will soon forget this one.
I know this may not be what you are wanting to hear, I'd bet it is similar to what your friends have been telling you though. It will take some time, but you can and will get over this loser.
Best of luck to you.
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