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boyfriend and interested in someone else
16/f
please, i'm not looking for any criticisms, hearing how terrible i am, or what i'm doing is wrong, or to be judged. i'm looking for advice. i'm sorry this is long, but the more details to more it would make sense.
i have been with my boyfriend for about 14 months now, and we don't exactly have a healthy relationship. when i say that, i mean whenever i try to break up with him he would most likely get an asthma attack from crying too hard. so i'm somewhat stuck in the relationship somehow, even though i didn't have a problem with even being with him. but then for the past week, i didn't get to see my boyfriend at all or even get to have a full conversation. even my older sister said that she can tell me and him weren't going to last that long. during that week, i met this guy that eats at my work place and he goes to the same school as i do. he's not the best looking guy i know or anything, but he is interesting and fun to talk to. i was just interested in being his friend, and there was a misunderstanding when we met and he said "how could i be interested in you when you have a boyfriend?". even though i didn't care that time if he wasn't even interested in me... he also told me he was interested in a girl but has never spoken to her, but that it was because she was pretty. so for the past week, me and him have been talking a lot and again, i barely got to talk to my boyfriend because he was always so busy. so i was thinking i was just talking to a new friend. and it's obvious nobody can control their feelings, i started to like him or be interested in him. he always walked me to class, he offered to help me in math, he always thought it was fun to talk to me and stuff. i guess i got the wrong message from him? because today, he finally told me who he was interested in... and he acted nervous and for some reason i was hoping it'd be me. (btw, i was thinking about breaking up with my boyfriend because i didn't want to lead him on... but yet i wanted to be sure that i did lose feelings for him completely and that i just didn't see the new guy as a best friend). and it turns out that it was this girl, who i knew... my friend, but i didn't talk to her as much. he still didn't talk to her but he heard she was nice and he was attracted to her looks. after hearing that, my mood changed completely towards him and made me feel worse when he kept saying "darn it, you were talking to her earlier i missed my chance to talk to her. i should've went up to you and started a conversation." he asked how she was like and of course i'm going to be honest, i'm not going to make up lies. but it started to bother me... i kept thinking "why doesn't he like me? he actually knows me, am i not as pretty? is it because i have a boyfriend?" and i thought about my boyfriend, nobody can exactly compare to him because he would treat me so well, and my friend would too and i did think he was interested in me... but obviously when you first date someone it's going to be awkward for a while. but i thought he was too "high class" for me, so i wasn't sure if i should even be interested. but now, i'm feeling really down.. i have nobody to talk to about this because i have a boyfriend, of course. what should i do? and if breaking up with my boyfriend is part of the plan... how can i go through the asthma attack? please and thank you!
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Every relationship has potential to get better but the two people in it have got to be willing to try and make it better otherwise it won't work everything happens for a reason if it comes down to you breaking up with your boyfriend tell him that things weren't meant to be between you two yes it will hurt him once you do tell him but evenually the pain he's feeling will fade away and he'll move on every boy handles break up's differently i think you should try and straighten out the situation with your boyfriend talk to him tell him how you feel he won't know unless you talk to him the other boy liking the other girl was a sign that it wasn't meant to be for the both of you move on and focus on getting your relationship with your boyfriend better unless your planning on breaking up with him
which is of course your decision
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Communication is the key, If you haven't talked to your boyfriend then you need to have a sit down and discuss how you feel. If you are leading anyone on it would be your boyfriend because it is only fair to your partner that you be honest and faithful to your feelings. First, Not everyone takes a break up lightly but that still doesn't mean you have to be in a relationship that you are not happy in. If you aren't happy then you need to tell him, If he takes it badly well just like the rest of us he will in time get over it. As for guy #2 personally from what you said it could be maybe he has feelings for both of you?..but at the same time I can't help but think maybe seeing you also know your friend he might be getting information through you? I don't know again you need to talk to him.
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