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I am married but found a long lost love
When I was a teenager (almost 25 years ago) I had a boyfriend for 3 years. he was the only one I ever truly was "in love" with. All others after him seemed like love but it was never the same. We broke up because he cheated on me. But his excuse was he was "practicing" for me. It was lame. I was stubborn and hard headed and never forgave him. Over the years all of my bad decisions, and mistakes were because I still always loved him and still wanted to be with him. But he moved away and I thought it was too late. All these years I longed for him, dreamed about him, cried for him. I recently sent him a card because a family member passed away. I met him for coffee when he was in town and we talked for hours. We have been emailing ever since....and discovered we are both still in love with each other. It seems time has stood still. My heart just aches. I dont know what to do. We are both married. I cant break up my family, and I wouldnt want his wife or my husband to get hurt. What do I do. I cant stop writing him, I cant let him go again.
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I have to say it... You are just as lame for going behind your husband's back right now as he was for cheating on you all those years ago.
You can't break up your family?
Then woman up and let him go.
If you can't let him go, then you need to come clean to your husband and let him decide what he wants to do about you.
31/f
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You must stop writing him and you must let go of this story you’ve been telling yourself for years.
You abandon reality a long time ago in favour of the story you tell yourself: The story where there was only ONE GUY, who you REALLY LOVED, and no one else has ever matched up.
And no one else ever did measure up, because you decided years ago that it was impossible for anyone too. You made the story you told yourself into the truth of your life. You wrote it in blood and carved it into your soul. It’s the ‘truth’ you choose for yourself, but it is not the truth that must be.
End your contact, and seek therapy to help you work through this inner monologue you've clung to for 25 years. Continue contact with him and you will damage your family eventually, guaranteed, and this destructive story you’ve created for yourself will only become more and more powerful and will continue to rule your life.
It’s time to take your life back into your own hands, see the world for what it is, and out the lousy novel you’ve written yourself into.
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