If you have the time to invest in this one, help out.
Question Posted Wednesday February 3 2010, 10:30 pm
Okay for starters I'm 19 and I know I have the rest of my life ahead of me, which is why I need some advice. I met my best friend when I 16 years old. We were so close even when he had girlfriends. When I turned 17 the truth came out and he told me he was crazy about me. I've always been afraid of getting hurt, and I never felt like I ever met someone who truely liked me for me, they only liked what they saw. I took it slow with him and he asked me out 5 times before I finally said yes, I was petrified of losing our friendship. But it ended up turning into the best decision of my entire life. I completely fell for this boy, head over heels in love with him. And he felt the same way about me. Other than school and work we invested a ton of time in this relationship, made connections with eachothers family and I thought we were perfect for eachother. He always would get mad at me if I even mentioned the word "breakup". In October of this year he broke it off with me, out of no where. Our two year was suppose to be in January and I was completely devastated. Ive never felt so much pain in my entire life. I never thought it was going to be serious and he would miss me enought to tell me he made a mistake. I asked him what happened and he "fell outta love with me" and missed being single. I felt like I was being punished for something I didnt do. I bought this kid everything, gave him all my spare time and to my knowledge I was a pretty good girlfriend. I spent weeks in my room, I lost 14 pounds, I attempted to commit suicide and I talked to a psychologist for several weeks. Now 4 months later I feel no different. Ive never been the type of girl to let someone into my life close enough to hurt me other than my family, I use to be the strong one about everything and Ive never got myself stuck up so much on a guy before and let him have such control over me. It scares me, I still try texting him to be my friend or anything and hes just cruel. He goes out constantly to bars and clubs.. when he would never go with me when we dated. Theres pictures of him and other girls floating around facebook and him hanging out with new girls. And I have no desire to even be with another person. I love this boy so much and I am so hurt and I cant seem to get over it, no matter what I do. We walk into eachother at school and he'll say hi but its usually all i can get out of him. He told me today theres a chance for us in the future but not til hes done with college.. but thats not for another year and a half and I dont even think I could wait another day to be with him. I lost my best friend and my boyfriend all in one day and I feel like my life has just been falling apart. I miss him terribly.. what should I do :(
[ Answer this question ] Want to answer more questions in the Sexual Health and Reproduction category? Maybe give some free advice about: General Sex Questions? inevitable_pain16 answered Friday February 5 2010, 10:52 am: I am very terrible sorry for what has happened. I can also say that I can relate. My boyfriend did the "I fell out of love with you." thing. I was like, what in the world just happened? I can say that it is harsh and it will be awhile before anything remotely seems better. He was a jerk for breaking up with you and you should realize that you can do better if he was stupid enough to break up with you. I promise you that it will get better and you will find someone else again. After something like that it's hard to give yourself you another man, but you have to ask yourself if you would rather go for it and have the possibility of getter hurt or do you want to never give yourself to someone and shun everyone out and be lonely for the rest of your life? I know its a hard thing to consider. But if there is also a chance that you and this guy do get back together than that is also good too. I gave my boyfriend another chance and we are great. (does that help any?) But do you really want to wait that long? You are only 19 and I would say go have a little fun! Show him I didn't bother you and I bet he will come running back to you. It is a struggle and i know that it can make life totally suck with these stupid decisions that we are sometimes forced to make, but just follow your heart and be strong. I have a good feeling that you will over come this and also find Mr. perfect. God bless! [ inevitable_pain16's advice column | Ask inevitable_pain16 A Question ]
Attention: NOTHING on this site may be reproduced in any fashion whatsoever without explicit consent (in writing) of the owner of said material, unless otherwise stated on the page where the content originated. Search engines are free to index and cache our content. Users who post their account names or personal information in their questions have no expectation of privacy beyond that point for anything they disclose. Questions are otherwise considered anonymous to the general public.