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Ex boyfriend
I am 16 female.. I dated this guy for just under a year he dumped me because there was rumors atschool that I was cheating so he dumped me even though I wasn't cheating.. My problem now is we have been apart for basically two months we have talked a bit decently but we always end up yelling and getting Mad but we have both aknowledged that we still have feelings for eachcother... I can't stop thinking of him he meant everything to me and was my life we had been through a lot together his name is in my doodles he's in my dreams please someone is this normal or is something wrong with me please help before I go crazy. -sleepiesheep
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This is normal and there is nothing wrong with you.
I invite you to not go crazy.
What you don't say is whether or not he meant everything to you when you were dating.
Was he in your doodles then?
Was he in your dreams then?
Or are your obsessive feelings the product of being dumped? And speaking of being dumped...where is the trust and communication in this relationship? Why does he prefer to believe false rumors about your cheating rather than the truth from his girlfriend? Why are these rumors at school? Can they be challenged? Will the the person(s) alleged in the rumors stand by you and back up your claims of fidelity? Can the person(s) making the rumors be made to recant them. Or are they just vague sourceless rumors that have no possibility of being contradicted?
No matter which scenario, boyfriend sounds too immature to handle a girl who has feelings as strong as yours.
Remember, the depth and poignancy of your feelings for him are qualities of yours, not his. It is an expression of your capacity to love and to be loved. These feelings are painful when not reciprocated but they are evidence that you are alive and human and full of the great and boundless heart of love.
Give yourself some credit. Find a boy who is mature enough to enter into a mutually trusting relationship which is based upon open and honest communication.
At 16 they are few and far between but they are there.
Work on yourself and prepare the girl for the quality boy you want to be with.
By prepare I mean to learn to be compassionate, generous, sincere, and self-reliant. Learn how to take care of and ask for your own needs to be met. Learn to hold yourself with dignity and work hard to forge yourself into a strong independent young woman with depth,intelligence, integrity, poise and self respect.
Don't let anyone (especially boys) undermine your strength of character or compromise your values.
If you put these efforts into yourself and your self-esteem and begin now to build towards achieving a solid and satisfying adulthood, the kind of quality guys you want will be showing up in droves.
By respecting yourself and others you will find that they will respect you. "Be then the change you want to see in the world" said Gandhi. You can do it! Good luck my sister!
And if you are sexually active or will soon be: PLEASE, for all the above reasons, please learn how to use contraceptives and practice safer sex. Pregnancy and Sexually transmitted disease can ruin or even end your life!
Viniya
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You miss him, and that is normal especially for dating someone for so long. (believe me i know, i dated someone for almost 3 years and he broke my heart and it was terrible. also, im 16 as well), but you have to think about what is best for you. You did have wonderful times together, but people do change. If you guys are fighting, dating most likely wont end well.
but if he is up to it, you two can try dating again.
It is normal and you still like him. when i like someone i dream about him and write his name everywhere.
It may seem like you are going crazy, but you arent, you just have a MASSIVE crush, or you love him and are kind of obsessed. but its ok. alot of girls get obsessed with guys. believe me!
I hope i helped, and if you have any more questions or want to talk, just ask, because im always here for anyone with questions!
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