|
He's trying to break my defense.
So i recently got a new boyfriend(lets call him M*xx), and a super sweet guy behind his "gangster" act. We have been dating for about three months now. Anyway after a dramitc experiance i made a vow to myself to keep my virginity as long as i can without any boys bribing me into it. M*xx has a diff. plan in mind. Yes, he holds my hand and kisses it, making me blush...but sometimes he tries to reach for my breast iwth his free hand when he thinks im not looking. And of course i push himm away. Sttubborn..he keeps trying. He tells me that one of these days im going to give into him, and i have fears that my vow will be broken before the year has ended. How do i keep the sensual mood going but not resulting in sex??
Thanks in advance.... 14/f
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
hey this is sweet and simple. if he loves you he will wait. i know uve heard that a million times but its the truth. ghuys now a days they dont care about the girl. as long as they get what they want its w.e. if that promise you made to yourself is important to you then go by it. dont let anyone stop you. he needs to respect you, and ur decisions. thats the truth. maybe you can tell him that you would like to wait a little longer before you lose it, and see what he says. if you dont wanna say it face to face maybe call him or textr him. but either way it has to be said and understood. you have to think whats more important to you. a promise you made to yourself or a boy?? im sorry im so blunt, this issue is very common with young girls. xoxo-anny 18 f . hope all is well. ! :)
]
Its not your job to keep a "sensual" mood going when he's going past your comfort zones, especially when you've made that clear. I understand that you are young and that he's one of if not the first guy you've dated, and I understand you feel obligated to make him happy.
Thats not what dating is about. Its not trading sexual favors so a guy sticks around.
I also get that you're in the midst of puberty, and for the first time you're dealing with the fact that on some level you want to do some of these things yourself. You've got good instincts, follow them, even when its not the easiest thing in the world.
You need to assert yourself. You need to let him know that this isn't Ok, and you want him to stop. If you compromise, all hes' going to think is "its working!". And yeah, he will patiently wear down your resistance until he gets what he wants.
Its not right, he's putting pressure on you you don't need to deal with.
]
Hi there.
You seem like you know what is good for you. I think you are a very brave girl for holding onto your vow.
You do not have to give in to your boyfriend. He is in the wrong if he forces you to do anything that you don't want to do.
If he cannot wait for when you are ready to have sex then he is not worth it. He needs to understand that there are consequences of having sex like sexually transmitted diseases and pregnancy.
If neither of you are ready for that then holding off is the best option for when you are both old enough to deal with any consequences that may occur.
You need to stick to what you believe in! No one can tell you when you are ready for sex. Only you know the answer to that. Having sex isn't something that should be classed as cool or uncool, it's something magical. You give a part of yourself to that person each time you have sex and you want that person to respect you and your wishes.
Good luck, hope I helped. Merry Christmas!
]
Well you seem like a very nice and special girl. Not many girls would try to keep their virginity as long as possible. Keep in mind that he's a guy, and all guys have that in their mind. Even the least expected ones, he's going to try just because it's in his guy genes. If you're still looking to just have some fun, but not go all the way, just try some oral stuff. You also gotta lay down the law to him that you still want to stick to your vows and you don't appreciate him trying to break them so soon while you're not ready.
]
More Questions: |