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Not over his ex
19/f
I've been dating this guy for a little over two months, we spend quite a bit of time together, and hes asked me to be his girlfriend twice. I wasn't ready then, but right when i was starting to feel like i was, something happened. I wanted to see his phone to look at his texts, because i do this a lot jokingly because most of them are from me anyway. But this time he like hid it from me and deleted all the sent folder, and then gave it to me. and when i looked in the inbox, all these texts were from his ex girlfriend (they dated for two years, and broke up sometime in July). Basically the gist of it was that he had brought me up to her randomly, and so she brought up her boyfriend but my guy got all offended and didn't want to hear about her boyfriend and how perfect he is. So obviously he's not over her..
so my question is, should i keep dating this guy? I like him, but it doesn't seem fair to me. I feel like a rebound.
Please all advice helps!
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Instead of prancing around the issue and just relying on intuition, ask him. Then, next time, don't go through a guy's phone! I know I wouldn't want some guy going through mine...
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You should just ditch guys forever and become a lesbian. You'll never have this problem again.
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I'm a big believer in women's intuition. I don't think we listen to it enough. Yours is telling you something's not right and you deserve better than to be a rebound. I think your assessment of the situation is spot on. He obviously still has some feelings for her. It doesn't mean he'll never get over it, or that he can't care for you at the same time, but you are right, its not fair to you. Every girl deserves to be the apple of her man's eye. Right now, you're not. He's distracted. I'm not suggesting leaving him behind and never seeing him again, but maybe you need to give him some more time to sort through his feelings. If you do that, you may find that down the road he will be ready for a relationship with you and it will be stronger for the time apart. If you stay, you'll be stressed out with trust issues, always wondering if he's thinking of her when he's with you. You don't deserve that. Be honest with him. Tell him what you think, calmly but boldly, and then back off this one for a while. Maybe he just needs a little push in the right direction to finally realize that relationship is in the past. Good Luck!
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