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She cheated on me, and then she left me.
My wife and I were got married on September 19, 2008. Though in total we've been together for 6 years. My wife left me for another man, kicked me out of the house we were renting, and moved him in not a week later. When I asked her what went wrong, what did I do? She said it was all her, and that I didn't do anything, this is just her.
My heart has never been so broken, despite the fact she's cheated on me twice before. I want our marriage to work, I want to reconnect with her and work through this. I know I am trying to find out what I really did, and I'm having problems. Is it that I was too nice or too forgiving in the past? That boundaries were never set?
How do I get my wife back, while she's living with the other man she had the affair with? I miss her terribly, and the lonliness is unbearable.
It is not like this man is any better of a catch. He is married, with 2 kids, just got out of jail for armed robbery, and I think he may have just been using her to get out of his halfway home. He doesn't have a job, or a car, or any source of income. I worry about her constantly being with him, I just want her back. What do I do????
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I agree with Michelle, this girl will probably come crawling back eventually, but what kind of deal is that for you?!
She's cheated twice before, and chucked you out of your own home. I imagine she wants your marriage to work too, she wants it too keep working the way it is, where she gets everything she wants, and you get to be miserable whenever what she wants isn't you.
You might have been too forgiving, but it's not your fault that she has behaved like a monsterous bitch, agian. That is HER fault. That makes HER a lousy human being.
Get into therapy to deal with your low self esteem and pick up a hobby to help take the edge off your loneliness.
You are the designer of your own fate: If you keep choosing misery over this underserving woman, you'll keep getting that misery.
The first step to feeling better about yourself, is to start treating yourself better. And that means leaving this woman in all her infinite varities of selfishness and abuse, in the past.
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I think you just need to be patient and she'll be back. Do you think she is not going to feel the consquences of her stupid decision? She surely will. And your going to feel it along with her if you take her back.
Be careful what you wish for.
Since you can't think of anything you did wrong, and I am sure you are thinking hard on that, then most likely you didn't do anything wrong. She is correct, she is the one with the problem. Please find a girls who is ready to settle down and fall in love with her. Your wife is just going to hurt you again and again. Some day you'll realize it was all a mistake, but by then you may have a home together and children and it will be so much harder. Especially on them. Please do not bring children into this mess. Do not think, (if you do go back with her) that having a baby will make her settle down and be happy with you. THAT NEVER WORKS. Please find someone else. There are so many wonderful women out there who would like a man who is respectful and a hard worker and will be a good partner, husband and father.
good luck to you
Michele
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