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Dad playing head games?
for about 4 years now my father hasn't exactly been around a lot, My older sister and my father had stopped talking due to my sister and his wife not getting alone and do not see eye to eye on things. They got in an arguement my dad called my sister and saying "Have a nice life" hung up the phone and they haven't talking in a few months now. A little while after this I've exspressed my true feelings towards my dad about how I also don't care for his wife and how I believe she is the reason that he and my sister had stopped talking. I've also exspressed to my dad that I think she is the reason that my dad and I don't have much of a relationship. "He never calls me...maybe if I'm lucky he'll call once a month.." I haven't seen him in months. It's been this way for years but lately worse and worse... I partly blame him for not having the balls to pick up a phone to see how I am doing...I'm really fed up with it. I don't know what to do, I can't tell if he's playing games with me or if he calls me because he feels he HAS too. I don't know what to do anymore and this whole thing has caused a great amount of stress on me.
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Honestly, it sounds like your father isn't the only one playing head games.
If it's important to you, that you speak more often then you two already do, then you are just as responsible for picking up the phone as he is.
In fact, you are MORE responsible for it, because you are the one with the problem, you have more responsibility to be part of the solution.
We could spend a lifetime trying MAKE people love us the way we want to be loved. Or, we can be gracious and loving ourselves, and accept love the way they are able to give it to us.
If you don't want to call your father, fine, don't. If you don't want him to call you, tell him so, gently. He's been calling all this time because you asked him too, so don't be bully now that you've changed your mind. Even if you want nothing to do with him, the man you've described here doesn't deserve your hate.
As imperfect, screwed up and even flat out asshole as he can be, take a deep breath and realize that just because he doesn't show love the way you want him too, doesn't mean it's not there.
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