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negative thoughts
so i am recovering from anorexia. i had it for over a year and my parents caught it early..15/f...now that i am at a healthy weight, i always stare at myself and i feel like i am fat, not FAT but not thin either. sometimes i plan on not eating anymore again but i will try to keep it not noticable so my parents wont know, but i remember how i felt and i just felt even more depressed so i always back out of it and just eat normally. but i am afraid that i am going to go back to those bad habits. anorexia comes in slowly and once you have it you dont even know it. i was so surprised when i actually looked at the symptons and it all added up. so whenever i get upset i always say negative thoughts about me, i always say i hate myself, i am ugly, i am fat. sometimes i cant stand who i am. its so depressing. my parents dont know how i feel but i dont want to see my mothers worried look and i dont want to see my dads angry face. my dad does not understand what i am going through and he has said many hurtful things to me, my sister and my mom. he has caused some of the reasons why i got anorexia..anyways, i just want help on how can i feel better about myself
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Maybe give some free advice about: Mental health?
You're going to be okay.
I know that sounds sort of ridiculous right now, but I honestly, and completely believe that you are going to be okay. Because I've know a lot, and been myself, miserable, depressed teenage girls, full of self loathing.
And you are going to be okay, because you've already figured out at fifteen what some people NEVER get: It’s those damn negative thoughts at the centre of all the badness, and if you let the badness in your mind rule over you, it only gets worse.
As much as it might not feel like it right now, knowing that, and accepting that is the biggest hurdle people face in recovery, and you’ve gotten over it. Congratulations. Seriously, Congratulations. Give yourself a big pat on the back and huge mental hug. You’ve achieved what millions of adults never do. You’ve realized your mind doesn’t always tell you the truth, and you are willing to stand up and work on getting to the truth of things, instead of just wallowing in the easy misery. You rock.
If you have a therapist (and if your mom is worried and your parents are supportive, it might be a great idea to ASK to see somebody, just for a few sessions, to get some personalized, professional advice) ask them for techniques to combat negative thinking, but as a general rule, there are a few really good approaches:
Sweat it out. Get a jump rope, a tread mill, take a quick run. If your mind and body have the extra energy to waste on misbehaving and making you upset: Take that energy away from them and put into something else.
Imagine the best case scenario. Your imagination is a tool you can use for good as well. When your imagination wants to think of bad things, sit down and focus on imagining good things instead. Imagine getting a scholarship or landing a job or internship you love. Go ahead and imagine completely ludicrous fun things, so long as they cheer you up.
Be realistic. Don’t jump to conclusions or over generalize: One bad mark doesn’t mean you are going to fail EVERYTHING you ever try in your life. If you brain starts to tell you that, tell it to shut the hell up. That is crazy and stupid wrong. If you start thinking because you aren’t feeling good, right this second, you never will be, that is also a crazy over generalization. Don’t set impossible goals like ‘Fix this now!’ set small achievable ones like: I’m going to write down three things that I did well today, and one thing I’m going to try and do better tomorrow.
Don’t assume the worst. Not of yourself or of other people. If someone gets upset with you, don’t let yourself think that means they hate you, or that you are awful. Instead realize the other things that are stressing them out, and assume that their anger probably has nothing to do with you. It rarely will.
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They got you help... Did they get you psychiatric help, as well? If not, I'd say you certainly need it to help you overcome this.
I know you don't want to see your mother worried, but she'd much rather you come to her and let her know what's going on so she can see about getting you the mental help you are needing right now.
Don't talk to your dad about it if it makes him angry. Talk about it to her. You don't need people acting angry about you having concerns over this.
Stay strong, because you are.
31/f
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