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Gay
17/male im gay ive been with my boyfriend almost 18 months we love each other a lot we came out awhile back and a lot of people were happy for us although a couple of people seem to think its abnormal they called us freaks and well we love each other why should it matter my bf has been a bit distant lately i tried to talk to him but he doesnt say much this has seem to uspset him im worried i might lose him i really love him what else can i do?
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
First off, congrats on having a long lasting relationship. That takes hard work.
There will always be people who discriminate against you. No one, gay, straight or anything in between is safe from it. Some people just have to let their views be known even if it hurts someone. Just think how lucky you are, years ago you wouldn't even be able to bring your relationship into the public. African Americans went from slaves to being equal in todays society, and slowly but surely, discrimination becomes less and less. I know over time things will get better, so just hold on and don't let people put you down. Following what people say you should do won't make you happy, now will it? If having a boyfriend makes you happy, then thats exactly what you should do.
Do you think your boyfriend is distant because he's having a hard time with the way people treat him for being gay? I think you need to talk to him. Things can be hard to talk about or some people feel like their being interrogated, so try to make it feel low stress. Tell him you've noticed he's seemed a bit down lately, and if theres anything you can do to help. You could let him know that what people say hurts you too, but it doesn't matter because you have each other. It could be another matter entirely, so don't assume and try to have an open conversation. Let him know that he can tell you anything and make him comfortable, and he'll share. Sometimes I feel weird sharing things that make me feel vulnerable or awkward etc, so don't push anything. But if it becomes a roadblock, tell him that you really need to talk about it to stay strong as a couple. If he knows that he is your top priority and you just want to keep him happy, he will appreciate it.
Good luck and let me know how it goes,
-Abby
(If you ever need to talk my email is maura1292@yahoo.com, I'm always here for advice or just to chat =] )
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