|
I need help.
Okay I guess I'll just jump right in here...
I am a girl, first off. I am 19 years old, and ever since I was really, really young (age 3 or 4) people have ALWAYS commented on how much older I look then I really am.
When I was 15 I once had a police officer hit on me while I was on vacation with my family because I looked that much older. When he found out how old I was the officer was mortified and kept apologizing and left... (It was at the beach)
It didn't bother me because he wasn't mean but it bothers me that I seem to look so old. That is only ONE out of the thousands of situations that have happened like that to me for the last 16 years or so.
It's not because I wear make, or even how I wear makeup because I don't wear makeup often and when I do I use very little, I don't use eye shadows or anything; I normally only wear foundation with SPF because I have sensitive skin and don’t want sun damage, and MAYBE some mascara.
I am on the taller side, I'm 5'7" but that's not freakishly tall, there are tons of other girls that I know or have met that are like 5'10" and they don't have the same problem I do.
I am heavy weight wise and I try to wear clothes that complement my body type, by covering up more than most girls my age and also normally needing to wear older women’s clothes because I can't fit into the "teen" stuff, plus I like the classy look... But again, I know and have seen tons of other girls that wear the same "older women’s" clothes and don't have my problem.
Today really pushed me over the edge because when I finally thought that at the age of 19 I was starting to look my age and blend in with my peers I had my whole class (in college before my professor came in) tell me that I looked at LEAST 22!!!! I look at least 22?! So that was there nice way of saying, I look more like 30 at the age of 19?
I know I sound like I'm being over dramatic about this but I swear I'm not, and I'm not trying to sound like it's the end of the world, but honestly, if that was all you ever heard, it would get on your nerves too. I mean when I am 30 am I going to look like I'm 50? My feelings are just really hurt and I don't know what to do about this.
My class today said they thought I was older because of the clothes and the makeup I wore but I think it's only because I unintentionally noted that I was not happy to hear how old they thought I was, and I already explained the clothes and make up factors above...
So, can anyone please give me some serious advice about this, even someone that has maybe experienced the same thing? I would truly and greatly appreciate a different peace of mind about this hurtful fact.
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Miscellaneous category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Fashion and Styles?
okay...I totally wanna help. I'm really into fashion and makeup. if there's anyway i can get a pic of you, i'd be glad to give you wonderful advice. I'm 19 as well so i know how you feel. I'd love to work with you.
your friend, lulabell aka lulu
]
I'm a man in something of a similar situation as yours. When I was your age, (I'm 39 now) I looked about seven years older than my actual age. Thing is, as I got older I kept looking about the same. I still look about the same as I did when I was 28, and I'll probably stay that way for a while. The point is, you're going to catch up to and then pass your apparent age. In about 20 years you're going to look about the same as you do now, while everybody else starts looking saggy and poochy.
Unfortunately, the pressure on women is to look as young as possible. The cougar trend notwithstanding, you're not supposed to be attractive if you're 30. Forget it. Wear what makes you comfortable and happy with yourself, work what you got, and enjoy life.
]
I have the opposite problem. I have always been told I look a good few years younger than I am, which although I'm sure I'll appreciate when I'm older, right now when I WANT to look old isn't so good. I find that no matter what I wear or how I do my hair or make up, my height always betrays me. I've pretty much finished growing and I'm only 5'0".
It sounds like you're insecure about your appearance anyway, regardless of whether or not you look 'old'. You mentioned your weight. Just cutting junk food out of your diet or walking rather than driving/taking the bus can dramatically change your weight/shape. This may improve your confidence and give you more options in terms of clothing.
If you prefer classier clothes rather than the convential 'teen' look then that's fine. If you don't feel comfortable in other things then don't wear them. However, if you do decide to lose a little weight, you'll have an excuse to get yourself some new outfits. Try looking in some shops you wouldn't usually shop in, you might be surprised at what you find. Not all 'younger' outfits are trashy and revealing. Additionally, try adding some accessories to your outfits. A well-placed belt, hair accessory or piece of jewellery can instantly update an outfit and make it seem younger and more exciting.
Adding some highlights or getting a new fringe etc can also dramatically change how old someone looks. You might like to go to a good hairdresser and talk to them about the best haircuts/colours for you.
Even if you don't feel that you look younger if you choose to do these things, they will almost definitely boost your confidence. No one is 100% happy with how they look and although it's incredibly difficult to do so, trying to accept and live with your perceived flaws is the best option.
]
More Questions: |