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so much for best friends?..
19f
so my best guy friend, we've been close for about 6 years now or so got in a fight last night.
he's a really popular kid, all the girls want him, but he never let that get to his head. he currently broke up with his girlfriend of a long time and now feels the need to be a player! and still hang out with his ex at the same time?! i don't want him to be like that! he's my best friend!
so i heard from people what he was doing to girls, like saying he'll hang out with them and then at the last minute say oh i have to go to my uncles, and then go hang out with his ex.
so i confronted him last night, well in a text, maybe not the best way to go buuuuut, this is what happened...
i was like i heard what you're doing to girls! it's not nice! and i told him how i heard about ditching a girl to hang out with his ex and lying about it and he was like what? and then i was like stop being a player mister! and he was like what are you talking about? and i was like don't play dumb, you're playing girls and it's not right. and he was like i don't know what you're talking about and neither do you. and i was like yeah i do! and he was what the hell are you talking about? he was like ok whatever linds. and i was like don't get mad at me! you don't have to hide this from me, so much for being best friends. and he was like ok sure yeah i know. and i was like ok smartass, maybe we should just not be friends anymore since you're going to act like this towards me..
and he never texted back! and then i find out he was with his ex! that boy, god i don't know! i just want whats best for him because i care about him as my friend and don't want him to be known as a player who hurts girls.
before he never treated me like this, like a jerk! ever since he hasn't been "officially" with his ex he's acted weird towards me and i hate it. and now, i don't even know if we're friends anymore? and now he's lying to me, acting like he doesn't know what i was talking about when he knows EXACTLY what he did.
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Hey,
How do you know for sure that he is playing girls? It could just be a rumour! When a person sees a guy with another girl, it seems they always USuaLLY assume a guy is cheating. EVEN if it is not true.
The conversation you had with him, sounds pretty convincing that he wouldnt cheat.. Did you even listen or ask about his side of the story? He could have a reasonable explanation. Such as he really did have to go to his uncles, then his ex called him, so he went over there for a while.
This said, he should know to stick to his previous plans and tell his ex that he is meeting someone else and that he could spend time with her later. Or just tell her that they are over. Obviously he still has feelings for his ex that he hasn't got over yet, otherwise he would not keep going back to her. Most guys just move on right away once they are 'over' a girl. Where he seems somewhat attached to his ex yet.
It IS possible he has feelings for both girls. You can fall in love with two people at the same time. He may be slightly confused with who he wants to be with.
He acts weird towards you because he could be unsure of what to do himself. Guys can be clueless and not realize what they did. He probably has NO IDEA what he did. Guys are generally senseless to others feelings AND maybe he didn't want to discuss this with you because he knew you would think of him as a bad guy or not let him have a word in.?. cuz he knows what he is doing is wrong.
DID you know your facts before confronting him?
You should talk to him in person, ask him what is going on. His acting weird towards you could mean he just wants you to understand him and be there for him. Just talk to him about it, and most importantly... listen.
Unless you know that he has cheated on girls before, is a smartass, plays dumb, and lies, you shouldnt assume anything.
You know him better than anyone else.
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I think that in this situation you should have waited to hear his side first the girls you were talking to could have been making it up and you would't even know because you accused him of it instead of asking him about it. If I were you I would apologize and try to get his side of the story. Tell him that you heard some things about the way he was treating girls and it upset you. Than ask him whats going on with his ex. From what you told me on the text it sounds like he doesn't know what you were talking about and you may have jumped to the wrong conclusion. Just apologize and start over again.
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