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suicide
This really isn't a question but a general comment towards all of the other postings about suicide. The problem I see is that we in the Western world view suicide as a sign of weakness. Turn to God and everything will be wonderful. Others say that what you are going through is temporary and to keep hanging in there. However, what is never addressed is the person. The quality of life that he or she is living now. Not only the here and now, but what steps or what road that person is facing to correct this horrible deficit in their life. I truly believe that our Western culture does not know how to deal with quality of life. In fact, our views of quality of life can be likened to a credit card. Just charge it now and pay it off later. In otherwords, deal with it later. I disagree. The quality of a mans life can only be measured by the person, not those around him or her. You can have all the friends in the world, but still be totally lonely if you are lacking any of the different types of love that a person can and should experience, i.e., eros, brotherly love etc. If you are at your whits end, and you truly believe there is no hope or no recovery from your present situation or so overwhelmed, then suicide is an option. What you need to ask yourself, am I being rash or foolish? That is where our Western society cannot judge, but often does. I have thought about suicide in the past and even planed it out. But for some reason in my life, it may have taken months or a year or two, I find myself looking back and thinking how stupid I was for ever thinking that. Then I'm amazed how wonderful my life is now and how temporary my pain and anguish was at the low time in my life. I'm also amazed to this day when people tell me their problems how bad they have it. Not that I'm insensitive in anyway, but know this, other's have had it bad or worse than whatever it is you are going through now. Not that I'm advocating suicide in anyway, I'm just saying that it is an option. Feeling trapped and scared and anxious are not options we want to live with. None of us. By the way, my method of suicide was carbon minoxide (classic car in a garage). You cannot reverse the co2 once it attaches to your red blood cells. You just go to sleep. The other option, is slapping 20 or so 100mcg/hour fentanyl patches to my body and curling up in several warm blankets to cause the drug to cross the skin barrier faster. Maybe even eating a few patches too. All I can say is think and view all of your options before you do decide to make that big leap.
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I knew when a person responded to my question/statement there would be phrases about youth and generalizations etc. Of course any descent human with learned morals to respect life wants to see everyone prosper and be happy and I do too. My only point in my posting is that suicide should be an option, not a last resort. I'm also saying that when a person takes that option that it shouldn't be considered immature or stupid. In fact, I would even go one step further and say it should be respected. I will also say that those who argue otherwise DON'T respect the will of others, but instead are imposing his or her Judo/Christian ethics onto others. These ethics are fine, but they can dehumanize freedom of choice and respect for others. Yes, if Rowe vs Wade basically says that a woman can have an abortion because it is her body, then why can't the Supreme court uphold suicide? Why can't we do with our bodies as we please with that aspect? It is my opinion that our Western culture has no place value for quality of life. Because if they did place a basis on a quality of life, then that would put too much burdon on the governments to maintain that quality. These are just my opinions. I'm not talking about just adults here, I'm talking about teens too. If a teen born with a horrible birth defect and is in pain begs to have his or her life ended, then we turn our backs and say it is immoral or illegal. When we as a society do this we are only thinking about ourselves and what it means to us, not thinking about the individual and what he or she wishes. Why? Do you or me truly know what is best for that individual. Are we a counselor who will get paid if we councel that patient? What is societies interest in what that person does? How many of us personally freak out and point at that person somoking a cigarette and try to do all we can to intervene with that person's slow suicide? Like I said, our Western culture does not know how to measure quality of life and therefore, probably will never value suicide as an option. Instead, we place too high of a value on hope and placid acceptance on the current condition. Also, if you empower a person with the ability and the means to commit suicide how many will actually follow through? The few studies I have read said that those who were empowered didn't follow through because they actually felt incontrol of something for the first time. On the other hand, I also remember reading about the lady who was in a wheel chair in awful pain and wanted to die, but society wouldn't let her. She had an incurable disease. So, instead, she checked into a high rise hotel, wheeled herself onto the balcony and pulled herself over the edge falling to her death. My God, what that poor woman had to endure. Oh sure, many of us would shun such action, but I on the other hand think it is absolutely discraceful that our Western society would have to force such people into that behaivor. So yes, what is right for the person is right as long as that persons fist, ends where my nose begins. I do care about people and human suffering. It is their body and he or she has a right to decide what should be done with it. Not society, not you and not me.
Now, I do what to back track here a little and touch upon teens with poor self image. Maybe they're overweight, or feel they are ugly or got rejected in some manner. Even adults can experience all of this. A kid gets rejected by a couple of love interests at school and feeling so humulated goes and commits suicide. Would this be a bad decission or his or her right? First, I believe it is that persons right to do it. HOWEVER, that person, based upon the information provide did NOT explore all of their options. Suicide in this case was done due to self loathing. But a point that needs to be debated here is if a young person can truly make a "mature" decission to end his or her life? Yes, that teen can. Age has no bearing on life experiences. So, even a teen should be allowed to think about the value of his or her life and determine on his or her own what that quality should be. Is one or two too many rejections the writing on the wall for all of life's rejections with love or self image even in adulthood? Is their one or two rejections in high school just a bump or part of a lerger problem that will lead into adulthood. This sort of thing just happened with the shooter who shot all of those women in a health club.
So, all I'm saying with this whole exercise is that people who give all sorts of advice about "don't do it", "life will get better", "pray to God" are not valuing the individual, but only valuing their own ethics and morals. Suicide is an option that people should be empowered with in our society and only the individual can determine what is quality of life, for teens and for adults alike. That is my opinion.
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You have a point. It's a point that would certainly be relevant to many people's thoughts on suicide.
Frankly though, it's not relevant to most of the suicide questions we receive here.
Most of the suicide questions addressed here are from young people, with tunnel vision and poor judgment, coupled with some temporarily horrible circumstances and bad brain chemistry.
Is that a generalization? Am I judging?
Absolutely.
But it's also a fair generalization, based on objective observation, scientific and biological fact, as well as personal experience.
Generalizing that most of the suicide questions we receive here are from teenagers in bad, and yes sometimes very destructive and abusive situations that are temporary, can be overcome, and that they are not (and perhaps are not yet cognitively capable of) seeing the larger context of is as a true and fair as generalizing that most toddlers stick random things in their mouths.
Sure, some toddlers might not go around sticking random things in their mouths, but no one is going to call me a bad, closed minded or judgmental person for assuming it of them.
I can agree with you that an adult, lucid and rational individual should be able to determine the value of their own life, but in return I'd expect you could also agree that many individuals are immature, unaware, irrational and objectively wrong about how they value their own life. Now, that doesn't necessarily mean they should be forced to live it if they don't want too, but it certainly does mean we don't have to take anyone's word on how valuable they believe their life to be! There is no reason to assume their valuation is objectively true or to declare it all relative and that what is true for them is therefore completely true and accurate for them. We don't have to throw up our hands and say 'You are you, so you must be right!' when it comes to someone's appraisal of their own life.
We can disagree, and if we do disagree, it would probably be good to speak up sooner rather then later, since suicide isn't exactly a decision that can be evaluated and adjusted after the fact.
So, in essence, I agree with your position that suicide is an option. I have no idea of your age or area, but the more educated and liberal the people around you, the more you will find people who share that sort of perspective and are in support of medically assisted suicide or euthanasia and the like. But I also think it is a good thing that our culture discourages it and specifically a good thing that we on Advicenators discourage it. We are absolutely engaging in judgment and generalizations when we do so, but that doesn't automatically make us wrong. Based on the evidence we are given here, we give the best advice we can. That best advice is almost always to discourage.
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