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The love of my life leaving for college..

Question Posted Tuesday July 28 2009, 1:51 pm

Hey, my names Laura. I'm 16, And the love of my life is leaving for college next month... :/ Please don't say i'm young and that i will find someone else, i think this boy is my everything.

His name is Ryan, hes 18. We have been together since Late august. We went from september untill may, then we broke up. We continued to be "together" but without the label of being boyfriend/girlfriend. He took my virginity, so he was my first. he was here for everything, he was the first boyfriend that didn't abuse me, use me, or fuck me over.

I'm really, REALLY scared. I'm terrified. He is going to college about 6 hours away. I have never felt more upset in my life whenever i think about him leaving. He only can come home once every 10 weeks. I know I'm going to have to deal with what is coming at me, but I really dont want too. Just whenever I think about him leaving, I start crying. I don't want him to leave, he cant. I need him.

I really don't know what to do, I don't know how to tell him that I REALLY need him, I'm the kinda girl that likes to talk about more serious stuff online, I'm shy. I choke on my words upfront, and if I talk about this with him, I'll cry. I dont want to cry infront of him. But I want him to know that Im upset.. I've been playing it cool for the last couple months, so has he. We both know were really upset inside.

I have a therapist and we talk about him sometimes, whenever she brings up his name and mentions him leaving for school, I choke up, and start crying. I cant speak, words dont come out. I cry for the entire session. My life will be misriable without him. and everyone knows it..

The other night he was telling me (via text) that he can only come home once every 10 weeks and cant do anything about it. I was at the car dealer getting a car, I had to walk away from my family and cry in the bathroom, I couldn't hold it in. I was misriable from just hearing that news.

Ryan and I hang out every day, have sleepovers almost every other night, we really cant live without eachother. I've helped him through alot and he has picked me up when I thought everything was ending (being abused for 8 months in my last relationship, and giving up) he gave me hope.. he made me into the person that i always wished to be, a girl who is in love.

I know it was my mistake to begin liking him knowing he was leaving for school in a year. You cant beat love.

Can someone please help me? I feel like im dying, I dont know what to do without him... Please.</3

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musicaddict1984 answered Wednesday July 29 2009, 6:35 am:
Honestly, if you two love each other enough to want to be together when he goes off to college, you've got a pretty good chance there already because most guys don't want to stay with their high school girlfriends. You both seem to have gone through a lot together and I believe you'll make it. If you're still feeling insecure about it, maybe you should talk to your boyfriend. I know he already said he couldn't change anything about visiting, but maybe it'll help to calm your nerves. Who knows, maybe he's feeling the same way too.

Best of luck.

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ohitscassidy answered Tuesday July 28 2009, 4:38 pm:
well, let me start off by saying your not alone i was in the same situation. i was also 16 and my boyfriend was almost 19, he left for college so far he had to take a plane im not sure on the exact hours, it was what he wanted and it made him happy, we dated for 2 years and he took my virginity well. so i know what your going through it was horrible when my boyfriend left i cried all the time like you, it is probably one of the worst feelings having the love of your life just leave, but you cant think of it that way i learned not to he isn't leaving to get away from you, he's leaving to gain more knowledge so he can get a good job and provide for the TWO of you, if you plan on marring him or whatever. thats how you have to look at it otherwise even though its not true, i know for me i felt like he was leaving ME but he wasn't leaving anyone he was just trying to make it so we can have a better life, buy going to school. unfortantly we had some problems even before my boyfriend left, im 17 now and i still talk to him but we arn't wearing the title of going out, we date other people and i have been in a realation ship and so has my boyfriend but we tell each other everything, and when he comes home we plan on getting back together, at this moment though we thought it was best to see other people from the distance and it has been working for us, but jealousy is a big issue we had to overcome so think about that. you CAN make it work, by emails and text and even calling at night it helps, everytime i get an email from my guy i like cry because im so happy.. it will work out, just remember he isn't gone forever he will be back

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