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jobs, mom, stress,...urgh.
well ive had a job at dunkin donuts for about a week now. but i only work once a week because there are too many people working there and no one has many hours. -.-'' anyways, so i go in today, and for about thirty minutes, all im doing is standing around doing nothing. everyone has everything covered, im not really needed. the manager even told me that i might have to be sent home early cuz i wasnt needed. this disappointed me, but whatever. then about 45 minutes of doing nothing, i start feeling really dizzy. then i feel nauseous and i start blacking out. so i go to sit down and the lady asks me if i want to go home, since i felt sick. and i said yes. so i called my mom and she said she'd come and get me. when she came to pick me up, all she did was yell at me and basically accuse me of faking it and just being lazy. she wouldnt listen to a thing i was saying. then when she dropped me off at the house, she said i had to go to bed and that i couldnt go anywhere. i was pretty pissed at her, so i went to bed and tried to go to sleep. then when my dad came home, he had asked me what happened, what was wrong, and i just broke down crying and saying i didnt like working, i hated it, i hated the job, the hours sucked, the money wasn't that much, and that mom was being a bitch and stuff. so i pretty much convinced myself i was gonna quit. when i calmed down, i went to go tell my mom i was going to start looking for a different job, and that i was quitting. she got really pissed and basically kept calling me pathetic and stupid and that i was just a big disappointment. finally i just walked out and got sick of it all. then i went on a walk and called a friend and while we were talking i had an epiphany and went to go tell my dad about it; that i was going to keep working there, but looking for a different job while doing that. and in my free time, go volunteer at the library. i was excited because my dad said it was a good idea, and so i went to tell my mom and she wouldnt listen. she just kept rolling her eyes and saying she didnt wanna hear what i had to say and said she didnt want to talk about it anymore.
so, my mom pretty much hates me now. just because i left sick on my second day of working. she wont look at me or talk to me, and everytime we do talk, she just yells and screams and its driving me nuts. how can i get her to calm the hell down and just listen to me?? i want to make her proud of me but apparently thats just not possible anymore! any help is greatly appreciated. 16/f
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Families?
If you can't get her to listen here's two ideas that you might can use:
1) Write it down. If you can't talk to her, try writing what you have to say to her. It may be easier for you to do too, sometimes it's harder for you to talk to someone in person, especially when that person is acting ridiculous towards you, like your mom right now. Write down how you feel and explain what you wanted to explain before, and explain what had really happened that day at work (everything you said up there) and explain what your idea was after your epiphany.
Give it to her or better yet, one night just slip it under her bedroom door and walk away. She will see it and read it. You will probably feel better getting it out and giving it to her like that and just stepping back and going away and letting her read it and take it in, and you won't have to worry about yelling.
2) Wait for a good moment to talk with her. Wait for a moment when she is in a really good mood not a bad one. You both are calm. Do something that will put her in a good mood towards you, if you must. Clean her room or something like that. Try to act nicely. Then, ask her if you both can talk. Try to explain all of that then. If you need to write it down so you get it straight and don't leave anything out, do that before you go to talk to her. Read it to her or let her read it or whatever you want. Make sure to keep your cool, even if she says something you don't like, or if she raises her voice at you, just try to remain calm, remember to be the mature adult that she isn't being.
Hope that helps some
-victoriadvice
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i blive the answer too this question could be many more than just one simply answer, in ways it could be hard for your mom too understand you when your trying too talk to her when shes upset. so maybe instead you should only consintrate on finding a new job and working well at it and when your mother sees that you are very hard working and is not lazy she will say sorry and then she will see a new light in you . and possibly talk too your day more about how you can help calm your mom down and get her too listen too you. hope that will help
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Hey there,
okay it looks to me like your mom is being EXTREMLY unfair to you,your doing your best to make her happy and proud as you say and all shes doing in return is shouting at you and making you feel worthless.
this isnt going to achieve anything only stress anger and hurt for you
at least your dad seems to be there and to understand you need to talk to him tell him how upset your mom is making you and that you wish she would just listen to you maybe he could explain it to her?
get her to calm down and just hear you both out then you can all sit down and work it out.
tell her what good is going to come from calling your own daughter names like that? shes expecting too much from you at 16 and its not fair most 16yr olds just sit around and do nothing i bet she hasnt stopped to think about that.
she should be encouraging you and helping you she needs to wise up and listen before she pushes you away completely
if her behaviour continues dont listen to her, like dont let her bring you down..she may think she means well by pushing you to do more but shes doing it the wrong way.
tell her all you wanna do is make her proud but shes making that very hard to do hopefully she will see sense and things will pick up
hope I helped in anyway and its good to have your dad there to understand at least,
good luck
<3
Jess
[15/f]
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