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fourth wheel.
Well, I had a bunch of groups of different friends. Well the one best friend of mine is awfully shy when meeting people, and I thought they could meet some new people, so I started trying to mesh all my groups of friends together and they all did end up becoming friends. It was really great cause I never had to worry about choosing who to hang out with anymore since everyone wanted to hang out together.
But now lately, whenever we all hang out together, they start joking about these things and I wonder when that joke happened, and I asked and they tell me it was the other day when ALL of them hung out. Now I didn't work or anything, so I don't know why they didn't ask me. I pushed it out of my mind and moved on. But now this is seriously becoming a constant thing. I keep reading on myspace surveys and hearing from them about doing so and so together and whatnot whenever I'm just sitting at home and it's making me feel like I'm being completley left out. Which makes me mad because they all never would've been friends in the first place if I hadn't introduced all of them. I just feel like they're casting me aside. The one time they all mentioned hanging out in front of me, I actually had to sit there adn mention how I didn't work and invite myself in a way. And the thing is our groups been friends now for about a year or two, well I've been friends with them all individually for four years or more.
I'm just suprised they're all acting this way. Like when I ride in the car with my best friend, I usually get shot gun and then we'll go pick everyone else up. Well then when we go somewhere and we'll be heading back to the car, my other friends who had to sit in the back before literally either yell "SHOT GUN" or I notice they juts walk at a pace faster than mine so they beat me to it, therefore shoving me into the back and casting me out of conversation ( I've tried talking back there and they just ignore me ). Also, with my best friend ( I practically live at their house ) I have jokes wiith their family members ( me and my best friend gave them joke names ) well now all my other friends call them by that too ( and they've only met the parents like, three times ) and joke about it constantly like they've always been part of it. It's been a joke me and my best friend shared for a year or so now. And also, they always text eachother, they never text me. They will every now and then but it doesn't seem to the extent that they all do eachother. Like I'll be hanging out with my best friend and they'll recieve and text from one of them sharing some news and I'll wait for my text and I get nothing ( and it's not like they know we're hanging together so they figured I'd read his text ).
And I could maybe understand if this is how I treated them, but whenever me and my best friend hang out, I ivnite them all the time, even if they can't hang out, I still let them know we wanted them to hang out with us. ( Plus, they're my BEST friend.. we're going to have times where we'll be hanging out together. These other friends in our group are eachother's best friend so they should understand how that is. ) And when they sit in the back I turn down the music and talk to them and have conversation going, but the way I treat them is never returned unto me.
I'm sorry this was so long, but I just feel like everyones trying to hang out without me and it's making me feel really lonely and down. And it especially hurts me that my best friend isn't inviting me to everything, whereas I would with them.
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wow that was a mouthful. but i completly understand. i am a freshmen in h.s now, but when i was first in middle school i made so many new friends and had about 3 different groups. but then last year they all became friends with each other because of me! and now i dont have a single class with any of them but they are all together!!! its ridiclous. anyways me and these 3 girls were best friends...but now its kinda like they dropped me out of the group. heres an example, a couple months ago the 4 of us kept talking about going to see a movie togther...i brought it up a couple times because i didnt wanna be left out again...but they talked about going to so i figured i was invited. They went without me! i was so pissed off at them. i wasnt gonna take it any longer. so i texted one of the girls...just saying what i felt...except i didnt let her know that i was angry. which was a bad idea because she apologized but it was all b.s. anyways my advice- say something to them...u cant just sit around and let the people who are supose to be there for u instead treat you poorly. i think its good to try to keep a relationship going...but you cant be the only one trying.
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Hey there,im really sorry to hear that.
its horrible to feel left out or unwanted,everyone has felt that way once in a while but after reading this its constantly happening to you and its really not fair at all.
you dont deserve to be treated and cast asside like that! espically since your such a good friend to all the rest of them getting them together and stuff always being considerate of them,inviting them etc.
you need to confront them or just your best friend and explain how much this is hurting your feelings tell her you feel excluded ask (him/her think you said him cant remember) why he/she is doing it,how come you dont get invited anymore.
say how youve done nothing wrong to deserve this.
it looks as though your friends dont value you that much,which they should! tell them that too
and they should apologise for their behaviour and for hurting you and hopefully start being better and inviting you and stuff but this should be automatic! tell them that also like explain you shouldnt even have to be talking to them about this!
by the sounds of things they arent being great friends.
if nothing improoves i sugest you try move on from them and make new friends (as hard and nerve racking as that cant be but you can do it if all comes to all) you seem like a kind hearted person and honestly you deserve friends who aprciate you and your efforts.
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good luck I hope I helped in any way and that things get better
Much <3
Jess [15/f]
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