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to marry or not I am engaged to marry a great guy next year. i love him very much. but i resently started having conversations with him about children. he got really distant about it. and the other day he came right out and said he doesn't like children and doesn't want them. I don't think its his real answer. he never had a dad( his dad ran off when he was 3) and his mother consantly tells him he isn't dad material. but one of our friends has a 4 year old and he always plays with her. people keep telling me that if he does't want children i should find someone else, but i love him so much i'm stuck i don't know what to do please help i need some outside perspective.
ann
[ ] Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category? Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
First off i would ask him if in the future maybe not right now will he ever want kids. now if he says no you need to tell him that you do and ask him how it will ever work out if you want kids and he doesnt. most likely he just doesnt want them now. there is not much you can do but talk to him about it. hope i helped. ]
I think you are mistaking how difficult it is for him to tell you something he feels will disappoint you, for him being unsure about his decision.
He says he doesn't want children. He SAID it to you point blank: That IS his REAL answer.
Disbelieving him would be disrespecting him.
If you love and respect him, you need to love and respect enough to take him seriously when he says he doesn't want kids.
Ask about it again if you need too, but don’t go off and try to hear what you want instead of what he saying. If you want kids to be part of your life, and he doesn’t, then this great guy is not the right guy for you. ]
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