okay so i've had an on/off crush on my friend anthony since last summer. he liked me the end of the summer & we sorta had a thing during winter break..i told him that i like him in april, but he said he was confused with a lot of things. as soon as i told him i started to not like him as much and then thought i didn't have any feelings for him (i do this with guys a lot) then like last week i found out that he likes my friend nicole and basically confessed his love for her. she doesn't want anything to do with him but i think she likes the attention she is getting from the situation. but i'm like jealous because i don't know why all of a sudden he stopped liking me (if he did). she thinks he started to like her because she was the only one home during the spring (they both go to community college) but now i don't know what to do, i don't want to ask him because i don't want him to think i'm jealous and being clingy. i need help.
The truth is, he doesn't like you. The only time I or any other guy I know ever "had a thing" with a girl and then said we were confused was when we didn't like her. Often times the girl was "played" or "used". (I know you may think this makes me a horrible person, but on the bright side I can now impart this to you with the promise people can change...after a few years and traumatic experience.)
No one "all of a sudden" stops liking someone, unless they never really liked them to begin with. At the very most he may begrudgingly date you, but he won't want to deep down. He has had his chance, and passed on it willingly.
He was probably glad you gave him an out by saying you didn't like him as much, that way he didn't have to feel like a jerk.
As a disclaimer, I apologize beforehand for the blunt advice, but trust me. I know everyone thinks they are unique, but this situation has happened many, MANY times before. It will happen again, if you let it. [ TheRationalEdge's advice column | Ask TheRationalEdge A Question ]
NikkiM answered Wednesday May 27 2009, 2:43 pm: My advice to you is to act like you couldnt care less. If you look like youre not bothered..this could make him start to like you more. Whereas if you act clingy towards him then it will only push him further away.
He will eventually understand that your friend doesnt like him and he will move on from her.
However, for me, any boy that likes my friend after supposidly liking me is not worth any of my time :/ Good luck xx [ NikkiM's advice column | Ask NikkiM A Question ]
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