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Sister problems
Ok so basically my sister gets everything that she wants...
Actually what happens is that evertime I finally get something I've been wanting forever, she suddenly thinks she should get it, too.
For instance, whenever I'm going out with friends or they're coming over, she always has to go out with her friends, too.
Or how I had to wait until 8th grade to wear makeup, and finally when my mom let me, my sister asked if she could wear makeup too (she's in 6th grade) and my mom said it was fine and she could use MY new makeup.
Also, she recently got grounded for a month (at least), and mom and dad STILL let her go over other people's houses, or her friend's coming over here, and go out shopping and go on the computer and stuff.
And just now (which really blew it) I had to wait until my 14th birthday to get a cellphone, right? And I've been asking for one for a long time. So I just recently upgraded my old phone, and now my sister gets to have my old phone! And she's only 12! She's sharing my bill of unlimited text and internet...
It's just all very frustrating. I work up the right to do things, and just when I get the privilege, she suddenly thinks she deserves it, too.
So I really need help on what to do and say. I've talked to it about my parents a lot but my dad always has excuses (ex. but this new phone won't cost anything, and it has to go somewhere) and my mom is just stuck on the idea that we get everything equally.
Also, I'd really appreciate if people didn't say things like "You're a spoiled little brat" or "She deserves that stuff, too" because I'd really rather not be yelled at about it anymore. And I also don't need the whole "She admires you by coping you" thing because that won't help at all.
Other than that any ideas will be appreciated.
Thank you very much! : )
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something you may what too try with your sitiuation is instead of talking to o your parents about how it is unfair talk too you sister it seem like both of you are close in age and it wouldent hurt too see what she has to say. after you talk too your sister see what happends and maybe if you be kind to your sister she'll be kind too you . hope it helps
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ok, so i had/have the EXACT same problem. i know it is extreamly stress full. i mean having to work so hard just to have your little sister get what you wanted so quick. you need to talk to HER about it. tell her how much it is making you resent her. and also, talk to you parents and tell them it really is not fair, because it really is not. Tell them that you have to wait for what you want and as soon as you get it your sister does too. tell them that just because you finally get a certain privalage, doesnt mean she needs to get that same privalage. tell them thats one of the few perks of being an older sibling, to get to have certain privalages that your younger sister has to work for just as much as you did.
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Your problem has nothing to do with the cell phone, her being grounded or the way she is or isn't disciplined by your parents. It's with RESENTMENT. You may not like being told this but deep down even you can see that you have a rotten relationship with and thought on her.
No matter what she does you'll find a way to see it negatively. Once you figure out why you truly are disgusted by her and work on developing a stronger relationship there's no issue.
When it comes to your cell phone your parents likely researched your plan and found that it would be good for her to have the other one as getting two phones on one deal works. You have unlimited text and even sharing with her won't take away from what you have.
When it comes to makeup be helpful and show her what to do but have them get her own kit. It's not healthy to share makeup either.
The reason everything is distributed equally is that it wouldn't be fair to either of you if it wasn't. They can't let two kids near the same age not get something the other has because of the problems it will cause.
Nobody is calling you a spoiled brat at all. We just want you to see it from another perspective and not let this stuff about privleges and rights come into it. Yes, you don't want to hear it but neither of you have a right to any of this stuff but should be thankful for what you do in fact get. Most kids don't.
And yes, she's 12-year-old and wants to be like the big kids and a teenager. You used to feel like that too. There must be something she likes about you and being around you that you don't see.
Try a little love and curb the anger and see how strong a bond you can get with her. You'll need it later. She's struggling with puberty, crushes, being accepted and you've been through that. She wants everything you've got just to look cool as that's what you appear like to her. It's an image and identity thing. She's not copying but rather emulating you.
You're going to have to learn to like her better and ignore certain faults. You have no choice but to go along with what your parents say regarding her as it's not going to change. She needs more attention from them than you do.
You're fighting because of the proximity in age most likely and different personalities. All of this really is nothing as long as you drop the anger you're fine. There is no problem. Really!
It's classic sibling rivalry and perhaps a touch envy on her part. It's easily dealt with if you work together to get past it and see that your parents are trying to maintain peace by making everything equal.
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My sister gets everything too but im younger. Im always grounded and she is too but she gets off the hook everytime. Just try talking to your parents again and tell them how you really feel about it.
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