|
It feels like me & my best friend are drifting apart...
Im an 19 YO girl & im having problems with my best friend (a 19 YO guy). He just recently started dating this new, younger guy & ever since thay started dating we haven't really talked or hung out or anything like we used to. Me & my best friend live together, work together, etc. So im used to him aleays being there when I need him. However, we have been fighting more & talking less. Just recently we went to thw drive-ins & the entire time he was texting his boyfriend or sleeping in the car. When I tried talking to him about, he really didn't have anything to say. What should I do to fix our friendship & to get my best friend back????
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
From reading what you wrote sounds to me that maybe your best friend has all his attention on this new boyfriend of his and that usually happens when someone just first get into a new relationship, they spend all their spare time thinking about that new person and getting to know them and forgetting the friends they have already. Maybe just give him some time and he'll come around. He's probably just going through that phase of being with someone new and directing all his attention to him. If yous don't have anything wrong with your friendship then you have nothing to worry about =)
]
As hard as it is, you need to try to give him a little bit of space. If he feels like you're breathing down his neck all the time, he'll drift even further away. He's most likely in a 'honeymoon' period with his new boyfriend. During that period guys and girls only want to talk to and be with the person they're dating. Once things settle down a bit and they've been dating a while, he will look to you for support and to spend time away from his bf for a little while.
It's good that you live and work together though, that means you see him a lot. Just try to stay positive and give him a little time to sort things out. If he keeps drifting away, talk to him again in a few weeks. Don't blame him for anything though, he'll just get defensive.
He doesn't want to be put between you and his boyfriend, so if you do have to talk to him again say something like, "(Insert best friend's name here), I understand that you're happy with (Insert boyfriend's name) but I don't want our relationship to drift apart any further. I don't want to fight with you and I'm happy for you guys, but I miss my best friend." Tell him that you need him to be there for you like he used to be and like you've always been.
If he feels like you're asking for his friendship, he will be more apt to see what he's doing from your point of view without feeling the need to defend himself or his boyfriend.
Hope this helps(:
Darby
]
More Questions: |