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Choosing sides.
My boyfriend's mom & sister-in-law have always kind of had a love/hate relationship, I guess. They get mad at each other then make up. I'd never seen it happen, though, until today.
I was at their house & my boyfriend's mom pretty much went off on his sister-in-law for not helping out with the kids (his sister-in-law has 5 kids & his mom & dad pretty much raise them). She was telling her that she wanted to be able to talk to me without having to yell at the kids, but his sister-in-law was just messing with her phone. So, then they pretty much went there seperate ways.
The problem I'm having is, I'm kind of close with both of them. I talk to both of them a lot & everything, but I kind of feel like I'm taking sides. They both sort of badmouth the other sometimes, & I understand them getting aggrevated at each other, but I always try to cheer people up, so naturally when they say something bad about the other, I always want to say "yeah, I know", but I don't want to be badmouthing both of them behind their back.
Is there anything I can do to not try to take sides, or help them without talking bad about the other?
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Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
My boyfriend and his sister argue sometimes and talk crap about each other. His sister is my bestfriend. I tell them that ill talk to them about it if they like but I dont want to take sides and i am not going to say anything bad about the other. I care about them both and they understand that. Theu just come to me and let off some steam lol. good luck.
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I understand its uncomfortable, I know what its like. BUT!!!... if I were you, I'd personally tell them both that you dont want to be in the middle of this (and you can say it in a nice way, I'm just giving you the basics). Tell them you love both of them and you dont want to hear them talk about each other. Say that there are plenty of other things to talk about but this topic is off limits. Make sure you clearly tell them that you understand they're agravated but you don't want to take sides or have any part of this. They will respect your opinion. You cannot listen to them then say "yeah, i know" because that's you agreeing with them, and eventually it can lead to a bad situation where it gets brought up in an arguement.
I know it can be hard to say that to someone, but I guarantee you, if you say it the right way and tell them that you'd really appreciate it if they didn't speak about the other because you are friends with both, they'll understand. And it'll be much easier for you once you tell them.
I hope I helped, good luck, & don't be stuck in the middle!
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