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'So-called' Friend
WARNING: IF YOU DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR READING 3 PARAGRAPHS, THEN DON'T BOTHER!
I'm 14, but i usually don't interact with the whole high school drama thing. But, I have a complicated problem. So i had this friend, I'll call her M and my other friend, I'll call her N. So M and N are BFFs, and I'm friends with both of them. I had heard a lot of rumors that N hated me, but I ignored them. Then, a trusted friend, I'll call her K, told me what she wasn't supposed to tell me. M had had an AIM conversation with K about me. And she didn't like me. In fact, she said I was a follower, and copying her personality (BS). Worst of all, she called me selfish, and that really got to me. She said that N felt the same way. When M figured out that I knew this, she didn't deny, just said that it was true, that I was selfish and a follower, and that N felt the same way. Of course, I was devastated. My supposed best friend hated me. When I asked her questions after she said 'We need to talk,' M said she can't answer them without N. I said okay, but N didn't answer my AIM messages. In school, N said that I could get annoying but she was still my friend. M said that N was lying to me and really didn't like me. I told her that we should just forget about it and act like we had never met each other because it was causing me alot of emotional pain, and this was the conversation I got:
M: you only think about you
you dont thnk i hav been put through things
on my birthday party last year my mom left for greece cause my grandpa had almost died
he is almost dead still
i have been frendless half of last year
and you are saying i havent been through things
i dont know
well
if you listen to what i say you would
I said back: o i know you have! you've had your grandfather almost die, which is most likely WAY harder then my grandma dyin cause i hardly knew her and im friendless now cuz you and N are no longer liking me
Me again: i know! i listened 2 that beauiful poem you wrote about it 2 it was awesome and it made me cry. maybe you could just get to know me better you'd see. . .
And all she said was 'Bye'
It pains me a lot. And I don't know what to do.
I don't know what to do. I don't know who to be mad at. N or M? What the heck is going on? It hurts. What if I m selfish? I'm not a follower that's BS. But I've been through a lot too. I was closer to my cat then I had ever been. She died 5 years ago and I'm still sad. I moved. In my old school, I was teased, I was an ex-member of a clique that I quit cause they were bad, and they teased me the rest of my life. My brother has diabetes, arthritis, and a possible learning disability, and my parents are always dealing with him because he does online school. By worrying about my own problems does that make me selfish? Now I have only a few friends. I have so many questions, and I doubt anyone will take the time to answer them. Gulp. Oh well. Sorry for wasting your time.
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Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
everyone has problems to deal with. its just the sad fact of life. M sounds like shes the selfish one to me. she sounds like a total bitch, and shes not worth the trouble she causes you. N, im not sure. shes kind of confusing.
heres my advice to you: TOTALLY IGNORE THEM. DO NOT BOTHER TO BE NICE, TRYING TO EARN BACK THEIR FRIENDSHIP. focus on school, and the remaining friends you have. in time, they might actually see that they really miss you, and may try to be your friend again. when that time comes, DONT BUY INTO IT. this is going to end up happening all over again...
drama cant be avoided, but it can be ignored. my dad says that anything that is causing drama in my life, i should just drop it completely. sometimes that means friends, certain activites, hobbies, or maybe even boyfriends. but these girls are trouble, and like i said, totally not worth shit. if they really hate you, just dont try to be their friend. its pointless.
just breathe easy and hang around K or other friends of yours. :)
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