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boy has a girl
im 18/f the guy is 23
Okay so my good friend set me up with her boyfriends friend, i was informed before we went out to dinner that he already had a girlfriend (to whom he was once engaged with and they still live together) who apparently treats puts him down, cheats on him and the only reason he is with her is for stability. We went out to dinner the four of us, he paid for my meal, he complimented me on how beautiful i am, and how mature i am for my age. So we hit it off, ended the night with a kiss and i let it be known that i didnt approve of the fact he had another girl and if we were to pursue something he would have to leave her. To me he seems like a genuine guy and i tend to be a good judge of character but its just because of how many times ive been messed with in previous relationships that scares me, especially the fact that there is another woman in the picture. But i feel it was good that he could be honest with me straight off the bat. What do you think of this situation?
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What you need to be careful right off the back. Because hes older than you and hes living with his ex. talk to him tell him its you or him. and since hes with both of you he will likly be aggressive towards the both of you. and if you want to get with him and live with or something like that you really need to get rid of that girl or you and him might not be together as long as youd like.
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HE HAS A GIRLFRIEND.
Don't get me wrong, stability is a decent excuse to stay with someone, but it's NO EXCUSE for betraying that someone, misleading a partner and trying to turn YOU into the 'other woman' in his life.
There is NO excuse for that. It is inexcusable.
It's great that he is honest about the fact he is willing to lie and cheat on her.
That doesn't make it okay.
A person might be totally honest about a deep-seated racism and a belief in white supremecy!
Honesty doens't make THAT okay either.
It's great that he is a geuninely nice guy and an honest one.
His behavoir still SUCKS.
And your good friend should be kicked in the shins for 'setting you up' with a guy with a live-in girlfriend. Seriously. I'd be offeneded if I had a friend who thought that was okay.
This guy is messing around. That doesn't make him a horrible person, but it does mean he is MESSING AROUND. He has a girlfriend. That simple fact makes it IMPOSSIBLE that he wont mess around on you. Don't get involved. Don't kiss him agian. If that is difficult for you, don't talk to him agian. Because even if he means well, he is not acting well, and you should have no part in it.
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i am only 16 so you dont have to take my advice
but i would say if you can see yourself and him as more than friends then i would keep talking to him and maybe go out on more group "dates" and if he knows he deserves better then his girlfriend now he would leave her and go with you.
and if your night ended in a kiss then it shows that there could be something there. he just needs to leave the girlfriend he is with. and maybe you should talk to him about that situation. and if you do have feelings for him talk to him about your feelings for him too.
hope i helped somewhat (:
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