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Age


Question Posted Monday February 23 2009, 7:23 pm

I just want your opinions on this. How big could the age difference be in teen years. Say like a 14 year old girl how much older would your opinion for her to date? I just want to see what your opinions are. Thanks!

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ashleyrguadalupe answered Tuesday February 24 2009, 10:49 pm:
I think 16 is the max....Not to much older so the can manipulate the girl

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LOL_x0x answered Tuesday February 24 2009, 4:15 pm:
From a legal standpoint, it would be best to stay away from anybody 18 and over (because 18 is the "legal" age). I'm sure you know the laws on that, though, so I won't go into specifics.


From a personal standpoint, I don't think 14 year olds should date anybody older than 16. Why? Because 14 is still very young, and most guys are much more immature than girls anyways.


And I think that once guys reach 17, they start to mature (even if only a little bit), and that they want more out of a relationship than "OMG WE'RE GOING OUT!!", which is how most 14 year olds tend to view relationships.


I'm not criticizing you by saying that or anything, but I've been there, felt that way, and see it happening now with my younger brothers.


-Laura (16-f)

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sousou1234567 answered Tuesday February 24 2009, 6:45 am:
Seriously, it doesnt fuckin matter in any kind of way.

Age difference is just another excuse for people to talk about.

Hunny i dated a 20 years old male when i was 15, and it was the best relationship ever and the only guy i ever loved but i had to leave the country.

As long as your wise for your partner, and he is good enough for you.

Everything is perfect.

Good Luck

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WittyUsernameHere answered Tuesday February 24 2009, 2:32 am:
No one over 16.

Maturity is an issue. People change, grow, and mature very rapidly from 13 to early 20s, so an age gap there is exaggerated in ways it wouldn't be with people older. A 7 year gap when its 35 and 28 is nothing like the gap between a 21 and a 14 year old.

Keep something in mind. A girl your age is easy to manipulate and control. Thats not a strike against you, theres just alot of adult experience you don't have yet, and dating a guy who was 18 or 19 is not a great idea because he knows from experience what he can get away with, what to say, what to do, etc.

Let me give you something of a random example to put things in perspective.

Lets say you've got a girl your age and a 19 year old guy.

A 19 year old guy has been old enough to be paying attention to girls for 5-7 years. He's had that long to learn by experience, by watching others, by absorbing information from many and varied sources.

The girl, on the other hand, has at most 2 years of similar experience. She is going into dates without many expectations, just hoping to have fun.

In a situation like this, the guy is in a position to manipulate the hell out of this girl if he wants to. He knows from experience what girls want to see, he knows how to show it to a girl your age so that its convincing. Things that a girl his age wouldn't buy into, she would, because she doesn't have the experience to separate the bullshit from the real.

A younger guy wouldn't act interested if he wasn't, wouldn't be nice if he wasn't, would say sweetly intelligent things to make you swoon. An older guy is likely to know how to act to make it seem like he is someone he isn't. He might well like you, but that doesn't change the fact that he has the upper hand and can use that leverage to get what he wants on his schedule.

I could list off hundreds of things I know now that I didn't when I was your age about dating. Things to pay attention to, ways to act, ways to present things.

A practical example. A while back I dated a girl who was two years my junior. We were both in our 20s, but I was alot more experienced than she was. I started dating seriously around 14 and was sexually active shortly thereafter. She lost her virginity at 18. Thus, I had close to a decade of experience while she had a little over three years.

Our first date she stayed at my place. Slept in the same bed, but no sex. She would have had I seduced her, she made it abundantly clear that she was willing, while saying that she was never this impetuous. Along the lines of "We shouldn't but I want to" from her side.

At 14, I would have slept with her. She would have been upset by it, and we either would have not continued dating because of it, or we would have not slept together for a long, long time afterwards.

Instead, I told her before we went to bed that sex would not be happening under any circumstances. I kept to that because I knew that doing things this way would cement her comfort with me. She knew she could trust me implicitly to do what I said I would. She had no reservations on the second date, and things continued from there.

I genuinely liked her, but things didn't work out. I don't regret what happened and neither did she, but the fact is that I knew exactly how to behave to create trust, I knew what to show her, and she responded by being willing to sleep with me long before she probably would have slept with a guy who wasn't as experienced as I was.

Thats the difference experience makes. The difference between knowing how to act to get what you want, and just being who you are because you don't know any better.

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iSpEaKsPaNiSh answered Tuesday February 24 2009, 1:15 am:
I have always tried to stick by the "half your age plus seven" rule. to me, it seems to make sense. this formula is for the youngest age that someone can date. so, according to the formula, the youngest age you could date would be 14, your own age. however, if you were to date someone older, i would advise you to date someone 15-16, but no older. just date someone that you are comfortable with and who you don't think would pressure you to do things you aren't ready for.

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Myrrha answered Monday February 23 2009, 10:21 pm:
A 14 yr old could date anyone under the age of 18. But, remember that if you are sexually active, anyone that is more then 2 yrs older then you can be accused of statutory rape, if your parents find out and press charges. The rule I followed when I was in high school was that I would not date anyone more then a 1-2 yrs difference of me.

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