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My feelings have changed towards my best friend
18/f
I have a guy best friend. We met in September and instantly bonded, we tell eachother everything. In this case, everything includes helping eachother with relationship problems. He really likes this girl and I've been helping him with what to do (ex: helping him with conversaion starters and basically just boosting his morale do actualy do something about it). I didn't think anything of it before, but recently I started feeling slightly differently towards him. I stated liking as more than just a friend. The thing is, I'm not exactly atracted to him sexually, I just really love our friendship. This is where it becomes slightly awkward; I've been having lots of dreams concerning him lately (and another guy too because I've liked him for years, but that's beside the point). The other night I drempt we were in the middle of foreplay and basically getting ready to have sex. I woke up sweating and wet and rather confused I might add. I've never thought about him in that way, and as akward as it was, it was kind of an 'i wonder' feeling. I really don't know what to do now. Do I like him or am I just curious? I could really use a second opinion. I'd normally ask a friend, but he's the friend I usually ask so that's out of the question. Thanks.
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It's pretty obvious you've fallen for him. In that case, you need to consider what to do.
Firstly, for now, I would tell you to hang back. Talking to him about his girl troubles will probably be more painful to you than it will be helpful to him. Most conversations I have had about girls is more venting than getting actual advice, so it ends up being about having someone rather than one specific person. That being said, I would stay friends with him for now, but avoid quiet environments where that topic will come up.
You express some concern about his physical appearance. I find that physical appearance doesn't matter much in a relationship. I have dated beautiful girls, and I get accustomed to their attractiveness after awhile and then they aren't as enticing. On the other hand, I've dated a lot less attractive girls and ended up with some of the greatest I've ever met, so don't let that be a deciding factor.
In the long run, I would not come out about it to him while he's with someone else. You have a good chance of just completely losing him, and best case scenario, a lot of people end up hurt. You can flirt a little to give him a hint, but doing it constantly will turn him off. If he's single at some point, let him know. It's typically a lot easier for girls to get out of the "friend zone" than guys.
In the mean time, keep your options open and don't wait for his relationship to go sour so you can have your chance. Live your life, be happy you have, at the very least, a good friend, and who knows what could happen in the future. Hope I helped and best of wishes.
19/m
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i was in your spot. i wasn't sure if i liked him either because i'd just got out of a serious relationship and he was there to help me. we told eachother everything. we were friends for a couple months then finally started liking eachother. we were screwing around for a long time then he finally asked me out. we were in love by then. we were helping eachother out like you are. i used to think that dating a good guy friend would ruin the relationship you already have. unless you both feel the same way and are going to commit to it. if you're not going to commit then don't ruin the friendship. i don't think this will help you much, but maybe you do like him. it's the best when you fall in love with your best friend. you already know each other. i know you're probably not think about love right now, and that's ok..it's what usually happens. you end up liking the guy you share things with. hopefully that helps a little
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