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i want things back to how they were
well heres a summary of the last few months with me n a guy named jack.
june 2008- we had known eachother for about a year but only became good frends at this time.
august- became best frends and started hanging out everyday.
september 2008- we were best friends but started to notice maybe we were a little more than that.
october- started to realize that we really liked eachother more than just best frends.
november- started hooking up n realized that we loved eachother more than anything.
december- got in alot of fights because of the fact he was with other girls yet he sed he loved me so much. but it wasnt a deal breaker because we werent actually dating. we acted just like we were dating except for the other girls involved with him. after a big fight he sed he was gonna stop talking to other girls and that he loved me and wanted me and only me. so we started dating.
january 2009- everything seemed to be going fine then one week he started acting like he was in a really bad mood but he wouldnt tell me why. i asked n asked then figured id just leave it alone. he basically was ignoring me half the time so i figured we needed to talk.
yesterday january 15th- he told me he wasnt mature enough for a relationship so i didnt even know wat to say. this guy who i love more than anything was basically breaking up with me. he sed he wanted our relationship to be the same but without the title. so basically still hooking up and hangining out everyday and tellin eachother how much we love eachother. which is the same as december except for the girls. so he sed he wasnt gonna get with other girls n i agreed the same. he sed that the title was putting pressure on our relationship n that he didnt think we would make it. his exact words were- " i just think that since we started dating uve stopped speaking ur mind because your afraid of what i will say and the only thing i want is for you to be completely honest with me".
january 16th today- i was really upset about what had happened n im terrible at hiding my feelings but jack came up in the foyer n hugged me but it was an awkward 1 arm hug n no words were exchanged. In the hallway in between classes we hugged a few times but never sed anything. at the end of the day i gave him a hug n asked if he was ok n he nodded n went to class.
i dont know what to do because i cant even imagine him not being in my life and i love him so much but i hate us being like this. i want everything to go back to normal but i dont undersatnad why he wants us to have the boyfrend girlfrend relationship but without calling it boyfrend girlfrend because he says theres too much pressure that way. i do speak my mind to him even though at times he thinks i dont n i want things to be good between us. what should i say to him?
thanx sooooo soooooooo much 4 the help!
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
I am going to assume when you say you are "hooking up" with this fellow, that you mean you are having sex with him. If that is, indeed, the case, then it is obvious to me that he is using you for his own sexual gratification. I will be blunt. He will not want to form a relationship with you because he hasn't had to work for one. Anytime you get something for nothing, it has less value. That is true of the world in general and it is true of relationships.
On the other hand, if you are not sleeping with this fellow, then I would take the hint. He is just not interested in you. He's looking for sexual gratification, either way, as evidenced by his need for other women.
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You should tell him how you feel, like everything from the begining to the end. Tell him how much he means to you and how you feel about him. And maybe this guy need to take some time to figure out what he wants and also maybe you should do the same to. If he messing around with other girls than he might not be ready to make a relationship commit. All i can tell you is that both of yall need to sit down and talk to eachother about how yall feel towards one another and go on from there. See what happens.
Good Luck!!:)
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