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friends ditched me
I'm 18/f and just started college. I made these great friends, but they kept talking to me about my bad habit of hooking up with guys a lot. They thought it was annoying when I would stress over a guy not talking to me the next day. I can't stop hooking up with guys and now they said that they can't be friends with me cause I act too slutty. I don't feel like I'm that slutty because I only had sex with a few of the guys, but how can I change my habit so that they will be friends with me again?
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Maybe instead of changing who you are so your friends will like you, you should find new friends who like you for who you are.
Think about it. Dont you want friends who are there no matter what are stay by your side. Friends that will tell you that your a great person but will also tell you when your being stupid. Friends that accept you no matter what. Maybe its just me but I would rather that instead of trying to be who my friends want me to be so that they will remain friends with me.
Honestly, your habit of hooking is no reason for them not to be friends with you. Maybe they are worried you will ruin theyre reputation or make them look bad. But thats just selfish. Maybe they think that your hoooking up so much is a risk to you. But if that was the case, they would talk to you about it if they were real friends. They are not real friends. And every one deserves a few good true friends.
If you dont want to hook up anymore because YOU dont want to be like that, then good for you. But dont do it just because your friends wont be friends with you if you dont stop.
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Start respecting yourself just a tiny bit.
Heres their perspective.
They watch you go sleep with a guy. They know that he doesn't give a shit about you, and they know that guys who use girls like you aren't going to call and they think you're kind of stupid for stressing over a foregone conclusion.
They also respect themselves, and you don't respect yourself. And because you honestly just don't get it.
"I can't stop hooking up with guys"
"I only slept with a few of them"
You're the one making the choice to be promiscuous.
Oh, and there aren't degrees of "slutty". You can't be "not that slutty" or "Just a little slutty"
You either are, or you arent. You either have standards, or you do not.
You do not, which is why they don't want to be around you. Your behavior is NOT ok, its not normal, its not healthy, and its not right. They don't want to be around you because it makes them uncomfortable to be friends with someone who seems to have little regard for herself.
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It doesn't matter if it's 'slutty' or not, Your friends simply don't find it entertaining or interesting anymore.
If you aren't going to stop hooking up with guys (or at least ,recognize that it's really not that interesting to everyone and stop talking about it so damn much) then you need find different friends, ones who do find your obsessing and hooking up interesting.
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