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i am confused - someone please help me make the right decision
I am from South Africa and I am 32 years of age. 14 years ago I met the man of my dreams. There was a misunderstanding, we broke up. Suddenly he is back in my life and I can't help but have a yearing for him.i can't sleep and i lay awake recalling our memories and conservations. I am now married with no kids. He is married with 2 kids. we phone each other all the time and I want to be with him. My hubby is wonderful and I don't want to hurt him either. He on the other hand says he wants to keep in contact with me but I am not sure what to do. I want to do the right thing but I don't want anyone to get hurt. Should I forget about him - which I can't as we sometimes bump into each other at friends/family functions. I know he wants to be with me - but he has commitments too. What must I do... I need help. I feel as if I should have a relationship with him in secret.
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Take it from someone that has been there, you DO NOT want to pursue this. You are both married and he has children. Do you think your spouses and his children deserve this? You took a vow. Before God.Believe me, no good can come from this.You will end up not only being hurt yourself, but hurting innocent people. Please seek counseling to help you deal with these feelings.You are not the first one with this problem. Please don't wait. You owe it to your HUSBAND to make it work.
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you have made a commitment and so has he. first keep in mind that people change. he may not have lost the things you fell in love with in him, he may be different than you remember. I would invite him to dinner with his family maybe and talk. After, if your connection is strong talk to him in private, then talk to your husband and be honest. you cant have an affair, as that will ruin both your happiness. keep in mind that he may not be in love with you anymore either, as hard as that is to believe, since you may have changed too. Just be careful and avoid sexual contact.
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no. having an affair will make everything worse. no matter how secret you are, you and this other guy will have regrets and you'll feel bad. what i would do is have a talk with this other man. tell him you want to be with him, but for now, you're weak and cant take into any temptations that could ruin your marriage. tell him you two can be friends, but no more than that. anything more will get you into trouble. :)
i hope i helped, and good luck.
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