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Advice Needed
Im 25 and my ex is 24. She has a child that is not by me but never else I loved them both as if he was mine. We were together for close to two years. I proposed to her. After a week proposing to her she wanted to go and get eloped. I told her that I wanted to get a place and a vehicle before we got married. I didn't want to live 10 miles away from my wife. After i told her that she broke up with me and told me that i was too slow for her. I bought over 6 thousand dollars of diamonds and jewelry on her and she bought me a ring. When we broke up she told me that she wanted the ring back. I asked why. She told me that it was a symbol of her love and she didn't want me to have it. So i asked her for the stuff i bought her and she told me no because it was a gift. When we had sex I always gave her more than she ever gave. Did i do something wrong or what. Please help.
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Based on your story, I cannot see anything wrong that you did. You have given more and asked for less. Plus not every guys can accept and own some other man's kid as his own.
The problem was her. I don't understand why she cannot wait for you to find a place and get a car considering you're doing it all for her. Maybe she's scared you might change your mind in the long run and not marry her at all.
Despite what happened I guess it's some kind of a good thing coz you have seen what kind of person she really is. I know you love her and everything but don't be blinded by what you feel. Perhaps she wanted the ring back and she doesn't want to return the stuffs that you bought for her coz she'll be needing them to finance herself and her son.
You have yet to meet the right person for you who can give you back the love that you deserve. Good luck!
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Was the ring she got you and engagement ring? If it is you might be out of luck because techinically an engagement ring is sort of a contract to get married. (Hey I saw it on Judge Judy once)
It sucks to have something end after a few years, especially after you have grown attatched, but honestly, you may want to count your blessings, something was moving way too fast for you, marriage is not something to enter in lightly and in the end, you may be better off.
Would you really want a ring to keep reminding you of that anyway? If it's not an engagement ring and you feel mean, trade her for some of the jewelry you bought her back, then pawn it all and take a vacation.
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Be thankful. Be very, very thankful.
Had you married this girl, your financial losses would total alot more than the cost of some decent jewelry.
As stated below, you ran into a user. Thats what you did wrong. You let yourself be a doormat just a bit too much and got a leech on you.
As far as the ring, give it back if you want. If she wants it back she owes you anything you ever bought her. Move on. Go try to find a girl who doesn't have a kid or two. You didn't list anything about her behavior but there MUST have been signs prior to this of her temperament with a reaction like this.
Figure out what they were so you can watch for them in the future.
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Keep the ring if you want too. It was also a gift.
The only thing you did wrong was not catch on sooner that this woman was a user. Next time you'll be a bit wiser.
You go played. That's all there is to it. She knew what she wanted and she demanded it right that moment. That made steady and sensible you a bad match for her.
Legally, you can't get the jewelry back for her, and neither can she get yours back from you. So keep it if you want it, sell it if you don't. And don't beat yourself up over this too much. Just be more cautious next time.
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