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Don't know what to do
Well I was talking to this girl for a school semester on and off. She's 14 and I'm 16. Everything was going great and we were closer then ever. But one day after being back together for about a week. She told me for I dunno the 5th time that she's scared to hurt me. So I told her how I felt about her " I know what I want and I I've found it in you" " that's how I know I won't hurt you". Then she said that she's trying really hard to find that something in me. After that i told her I haven't been completly myself around her I meant that I'm kinda more outgoing when I'm with my friends. And that I really like her and that I want to be with her and I asked her if she wanted to be with me. She told
Me that she doesn't want the same relationship that i want. So we ended it and i stopped talking to her. The next day at school she told me that she was sorry and what she really meant was that she doesn't want to lose me if she messes up. We talked later that night about figuring out what she wants she told me all the things she wants her bf to have out of about 10 things I had all but maybe 2. So what my question is is what do you think? Am I not good enough to meat her standards or does she really not want to lose me? She said she wants to be best friends but right now were more like aquantences (my choice). 1 more question tthis one is for girls what do you look for in a guy?
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Okay, so it sounds like this girl doesn't really know what she wants right now. I hate to say it, but the girl is 14, so she's still really too young to get serious. I think she is still having issues as to what defines her interests and what she really wants in a guy. I'd say you leave her alone, and find someone else who can make you feel good about yourself. It's only hurting you in the long run if you keep holding on to her in the midst of her problems. Find someone who is ready for something more, and more mature. Because it seems to me that if you only relate to like two of her 10 things that more than likely you two aren't gonna be happy campers.
And as for what us girls look for in guys:
someone who is mature, will love us even for our flaws, tells us we're beautiful and believes it, trustworthy, not pressurous, protective, but not overly jealous, b/c that's just annoying. funny and can get along with our friends and family
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It sounds like she really wants to be your friend, but you can't do that because you want more. You can do two things. 1. You can decide that you like her personality and want to be her friend. 2. You can't hang out with her because it will be to hard to be around her without being her boyfriend. You told her how you feel, and there is nothing else you can do. The one thing you shouldn't do is pressure her into dating you, or make her feel bad. Women are fickle, and you may just find out that the more you get over her, the more she gets into you. If you do hang out with her, be that outgoing person you are around your other friends, treat her like a friend, and don't let on that you are still into her. If she approaches you and says that she wants to be with you, but not lose you if she messes up, tell her that sounds like code for she is looking into other guys and you're not into it. Don't bend over backwards, or give her this idea that you will be waiting for her, or that she can see other guys and still be with you. It sounds to me that she likes another guy, and is kind of holding on to you in the meantime while she figures out where this other thing goes.
There are two different answers to "what do girls look for in a guy" because girls look for one thing and go after another. All girls say that they want a guy who is cute, nice, etc, but what they really want is a guy that they can repect. If you are going to change your personality, or build your schedule around her, she is going to think you aren't worth it. If you think highly of yourself, and hang out with your friends, and have a life outside of your relationship, your girl may complain, but she won't go anywhere. We all have this weird desire to have what we can't really have. When you and this girl first met, she was probably muchdifferent, huh. When she was wondering if you liked her, she was in to you. Once she knew for sure, she set her sights on the next guy she wasn't sure she could have. Play her game back on her, and don't be so open with your feelings.
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