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christmas blues
17/f
god i cant help but be depressed, its the holidays when you really start thinking about love, im not speaking romantically im speaking of in my family. you see i got kicked out of my house about 5 months ago for not having a full time job, im living with my grandma who is not speaking with my parents its been hard but ive been getting through it, i have a strong head on my shoulders. now it almost christmas and i havent spoken with my parents or seen my little brother who is five in that long, i can see people look at me and as they talk to me i know what they are thinking, but i dont want their pity. i wish i could just focus on the true meaning of christmas but its just hard when everything you are use to suddenly isnt there anymore, let alone not caring about you. dont get me wrong i am eternally thankful for what i do have and what god has given me as of now. as im writing this i cant help but cry, i've never cared about the gifts, it was the love of family, i wish i could forget its christmas but i realize thats unrealistic. i guess i just wanted to talk about it thats all, possibly even hear your view on this or whats going on in your family during this time of the year.
thank you for reading this.
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What your family has done in kicking you out is not only cruel and unusual it's illegal. They must provide for you until you are 18-years-old. If they kicked you out 5 months ago that's not right and they can't get away with it.
This has little to nothing to do with taking up with grandma or the reasons. Most 17-year-olds let alone those in early 20s lack full-time jobs. If they're kicking you out over that than something isn't right with them mentally.
Are you sure there is no drug, alcohol, partying type problems on top? I think it's in your best interest to get your school administrators to intervene her and get counseling to empower yourself and perhaps them to change.
I know how bad you must feel at this time but if you reach out to others and become a better person in spite of this that's the best gift you can receive. Being grateful even if you have little leads you to have more in the long run. Definitely bring your situation to the attention of the adults in your life. They might be able to make things better and more tolerable.
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It's normal to feel this way, especially during the holidays because you're in a touch situation, and those things are hard to deal with. It must be hard not seeing your parents or your brother, and you should cry, don't bottle anything up inside. You should also talk to someone about this, like your grandma or someone you trust dearly. If you want, you can inbox me and talk about it more thoroughly, I don't mind listening at all, as long as it will help you. you sound lieka great person, and never forget that. It will get better in the future, no matter how much you probably don't feel like it will now. write about it, talk about it, cry about it, scream about it, you deserve to be happy, and the only way to get there is to leave the past in the past and move onto the future.
happy holidays :] and i mean that. good luck! hope i helped. xxo.
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