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How Do I Tell Him I Like Him?
14/f
Okay, just as a warning, this is going to be REALLY long. Please, anyone who reads this, please read ALL of it, since there are a lot of details to the situation. Okay, here goes!
So, I have been going to the same church for like three years now, and there's this one really awesome guy I like. For this I'll just call him Tom, even though that's not his real name. I just really started liking him this spring, although we had known each other before hand. I'm kind of a tomboy and I'm rather anti-social, as in I like/dislike things most other girls don't/do. Basically, I detest shopping, make-up could go burn in the fiery abyss for all I care, the color pink makes me vomit, perfume can actually give me serious breathing problems, I enjoy being messy, dirt is awesome, I don't give much crap about my appearance, aside from looking slightly presentable, weapons are wonderful, I train obsessively in martial arts, I'm okay with violence/blood, swords make me feel all fuzzy inside, and I get along better with animals than I do with people. I've pretty much always hated all guys because I was pretty much abused by other boys in my early and pre school years, ie getting choked by a kid in 1st grade. As a result, I really hate pretty much all guys and I feel almost violent, so when I find a guy I like and can relax around, it's really nice. So anyway, Tom and I really started talking more early this year when I got seriously PO'd at this other dude who wouldn't leave me alone. For whatever reason, even though I was flipping out at all the other guys, Tom was the only one who could come near me, and he helped me calm down. And even though this sounds weird, he was only able to calm me down by showing me his weapons magazine, full of swords, daggers, archery equipment, rifles, etc. It put me in a happy place, and I was finally able to relax enough to survive the other guys.
Tom is really awesome, he loves a lot of things I do, including hunting, weapons, animals, anime/manga, action movies, etc. After service at church, we're always trying to find each other to talk. It's practically the only thing I've been doing lately at the church I go to. Tom is really nice, at least to me. It feels like he knows everything I do, and knows how I feel, and we act similarly in a situation. He just... Makes me feel amazing, which has never happened to me with a guy before. Tom's technically a year younger than me, but we're in the same age group, and I really wish I could see him more often than once a week.
So anyways, how the heck do I tell him I like him? I have no clue if he feels the same way about me, or w/e. I'm so afraid I'll get rejected or he'll feel all awkward or something. Should I wait for him to say something? I really like him, and I've never had a boyfriend before, and I'm starting to get kinda lonely since even my sister has had a wonderful bf for almost a year now. Please, please help me! I'm really confused! ;_;
~Weapon
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write him a note! i did that to a kid i liked. i pretty much said hey i think youre cute text me sometime :) and i left my number. and we actually talked a few times after that. try it!
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Firstly, I'm really glad you've found someone who makes you feel comfortable and you have similar interests with.
If I were in your position, I'd definitely just suck it up and ask him to hang out some time. Try and make the effort to talk to him outside of church (call/txt/online/etc) if possible, too.
Giving hints you like him is a start - and you making the effort to talk and want to hang out with him is definitely the way to go.
If he doesn't pick up on it, just ask. Quite simply: a lot of the time, if you don't ask, you don't get! So just go for it. You don't have to make a massive deal about it, slip it into conversation if you can "I like you, we should hang out more" etc etc, or if you're very shy and can't do it in person, send a txt/write a note/etc.
but I must warn you of one thing.. Let's just say he did say no. Of course you're going to feel upset with his decision but when you see him afterwards, you must act like you're completely fine with it, to show you are confident (even if inside you really aren't).. but hopefully, that won't happen.
If you need any more help, feel free to ask. and I wish you the best of luck! and happy holidays.
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Sometimes, you have to take a risk, go out on a limb, and just tell the person you liek how you feel about them. I know it's scary, and even though you might have a tough exterior, it must be terrifying being so vulnerable. So take it slow, you should probably give him some hints, like flirt with him, or ask him to hang out with you outside of church. Feeling lonely is normal, because almost everyone wants to feel needed and loved, it's an instinct within us, so if he fulfills this lonliness you have inside, you should just tell him. Maybe be like, "So, have you ever had a girlfriend" and whatever he says you could say, "well, have you ever thought about us dating? because I like you..."
Anything like that, but definetly ask him to hang out with you, one on one.
Hope I helped, good luck, and if you have any other questions just inbox me :] xxo
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