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Dangerous Game!
okay so i know we've all done it at one point or another, but see i met this boy...
i really like him but hes definitely the type of guy liked by EVERYONE and he knows it, and he loves to play mind games. he doesn't seem to be looking to commit, but hes also not a player he is the sweetest when it comes to girlfriends. its getting the gf status thats hard. i know that he likes me and im sure he wants me...thats not the problem. the problem is that i dont want to just give in to him so easily because i know him, and he WILL get bored. if we kiss, go out, hook up, w/e then in a week he'll be like 'alright were friends right?' and i want more than that. so i know this is really not the way to get someone...but i want to play his game. That's why i need advice...
what can i do to make him want me on a more serious level??? how do i play these mind games and do you think they can work? and please no lectures about how wrong this is because honestly its human nature to get bored if something is too easy we all do it. so in a way I'm just keeping things interesting. and besides, he does it too!
THANKS! =)
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
well its hard to be specific if i dont know him or the way he acts but i do know the way to make him crazy is for you to not want him as much as every other girl or atleast make it seem that way to him. He'll keep wondering why almost every girl wants him except you. therefore he'll do more to get your attention and impress you. let me know if you need anything else just ask! hope i helped!
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Although you aren't totally off the mark on the 'human nature' point, mind games still don't really work. When they seem too, it's really more pure dumb luck then it is cunning.
It really is much, much simpler then that.
If someone can hook up with anybody, become the person they can have more then just a hook up with. Try to be the person who is a joy to be around, the person who is a decent conversationalist and who expands their horizons. The best relationships I've ever had have been the ones where it's a bit of a struggle to decide if you want to kiss them or keep on talking them.
If the chemistry to want to kiss is there, then it's there. It's the chemistry of enjoying one another as people you want to cultivate, and that isn't a mind game! That's just being an awesome friend, an good listener, and a generally fun person to be around.
Listen to what the other person is interested in, and try to show them something new or related to it they don't know about. Listen closely to what they say they are up to and ask follow up questions that show you are interested the next time you met. Pay attention to what conversations and games really get them excited and engaged, and initiate those! They like to talk about beat poets, hit the library or pick up some cool biographic facts on Burroughs. They want to talk hockey, read a few blogs and pick up some key phrases or forecasts for their favorite team.
Again, that isn't game playing. That's just being a good friend and expressing a real interest in another person.
It's really not rocket science, and when it comes to attraction rocket science is useless anyways. It's just about paying attention and being engaging. IF you do that, and there is chemistry, then all that is left to do is make sure they are clear about your interest, either because you flat out tell them, or because your behavior makes it clear: You wont hook up. You provide a guy with more than that, so you expect more in return.
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