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humorist-workshop
Ha! Rejected...
So basically, I've never, ever made the first move, cause I've never really had to. Yes I know, it's a bad way to live through life, but it's just easier. Anyway, tonight I actually get the cojones to talk to this guy, and something tells me I got blown off. Technically, he had made the first move, cause he said hi about a week ago, I just thought I'd return the favor. He seemed oddly uninterested, like he was rushing. I'm so....confused. I've never had this happen to me before. I'm not mad, just kind of amused. How do guys do that on a daily basis? How do they handle the rejection? It's not that hard for me to ignore him the next time I see him, cause if he wants bitchy, he's got it. But am I jumping to conclusions? I'm certainly not approaching him again, but I do wanna know what went wrong. Suggestions? Opinions?
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I think your jumping to conclusions. I've been that way before with a guy. All guys are different. Maybe he was busy or something else was on his mind when you said hi. He said hi to you before so it can't be that he hates you. So maybe he was busy or something else. Maybe try it some other time. I said hi to this one guy I liked awhile ago and it seemed like he was uninterested in me or something. So I was thinking like, "what did I do wrong?" But he did end up saying hi to me first another day. I don't really know where you were or anything so I can't exactly tell you a straight answer. But just say hi to him again. Good luck!
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You are jumping to conclusions.
You are shooting yourself in the foot.
And, without meaning to offend you, you are being a bit self-absorbed.
Why assume that him being rushed or distracted has anything to do with you? Have you never blown off a stranger, or a friend, or even a crush when you had a lot of other stuff on your mind. Have you never been in a really sour mood? I have those moments almost daily.
You didn't describe the event at all, so I can't really tell you what you might have done wrong, but what you are doing wrong now is taking one simply brush off as 'rejection' rather then bouncing back and thinking either:
One: He was unpleasant and now I'm not interested in getting to know him anymore.
Two: He seems distracted. Wonder if I give it another try at a different time he'll be in a better mind space to meet a new person…
If you don’t surrender your control of your own choices and emotional state to the other person AND don’t jump to self-centered conclusions, this simple interaction between human beings doesn’t really feel like rejection at all. It happens everyday. I smile extra large at the cute guy at the gas station and make a joke: He hardly looks up. That isn’t rejection. That is distraction and apathy, and I don’t take it personally.
For all you know, this near-total stranger just realized he was gay. It might have had that little to do with you personally, and since you've decided to never approach him again, you might never know. But you shouldn't assume or jump the ‘rejection’ conclusion. Although it might be true, it’s really not the most likely explanation, and it will only make you unhappy and confused to you try to read a strangers mind.
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