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Cheating / something / confusion.
Me and my girlfriend were at a (female) friend's place recently for a party. To cut a long story short, a large quantity of liquor was consumed, and we ended up sharing her bed.
We ended up fooling around rather a lot... her one rule was not reaching 4th with the friend. This was okay, this was permitted.
It was in the morning that things went badly - her friend was still rather affectionate, but I was told that this morning was the end of it. My girlfriend fell asleep again and the affection was returned. Halfway through it all she woke up again.
Needless to say, we are in trouble.
I went through a big show of assuring her that it was all okay, that it meant nothing to me and that she had nothing to worry about.
I just wish I felt that sure.
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I assume by 4th you mean a homerun, as in intercourse.
Honestly, I'm not sure which is more bizarre; your girlfriend letting you fool around with her friend, or you actually doing it. That is not a normal relationship. You are friends with benefits that are slightly more possessive. That is all. To disagree is simply denial.
I find your choice of words when you say "a big show" as having fascinating undertones. Your entire relationship is just this show; nothing is real, the emotion and feelings are not exclusive, and the usage of the words boyfriend and girlfriend is for status only. It's not built on anything.
If you're looking for a real relationship with real boundaries and real feelings, you will not find it with this girl.
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I'm not really sure exactly what happened, but if I understand you correctly you guys fooled around while you were drunk. Allowing that to happen with her friend or your friend was a mistake on your girlfriend's part. I'm sure she thought that this was something she could handle, but as most people find out in the end...they cant!!! So, I guess you will need to figure out how you really feel about your girlfriend and if its worth hurting her to pursue something with the friend. You also need to keep in mind that the excitement of messing with the friend will no longer exist if you decide to be with her in a relationship because it is mostly fun to you now because it is like forbidden fruit. If this girl is making passes at you, she really isn't a friend to your girlfriend either. if you chose to continue to mess with the friend, you could create trust issues in your relationship that are irrepairable and could ultimately claim your relationship. So, think about it and choose wisely, remembering the long run...not just the right now.
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Well first why don't you feel sure about it? why you find out why that i think you can answer the question your asking for yourself. But in the mean time try thing over what happen what you told her and all that. try to relate to it through her eyes than you might see the problem differently and you might be able to see why you are not so sure.
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