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love?
ok, my boyfriend of like 2 weeks told me today that he loved me.. i was kinda speechless and didn't end up saying anything because i was so taken back by it. its not that i don't love him, i just don't really know yet, its only been 2 weeks and this is my first relationship. anyway, what does that exactly say about him (saying that he loves me so early in the relationship) and what can i say next time he says that to be that won't hurt his feelings or anything like that? if anyone could help me out a bit, that would be great, thanks in advance for your advice :)
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Okay i completely understand. This happened to me aswell. My boyfriend told me he loved me after 3 weeks and i didn't say it back i just gave him a kiss and i did feel kinda bad cos i did love him but i just didn't think he meant it so soon, then after just around 5 months i said it too him and he said it back. when i did he asked me why i hadn't said it the very first time he did, so i told him the truth that i didn't no if he meant it and he basically told me that he did nd tht. All i can say is don't worry about it you'll know when your ready to actually say it.
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Men aren't emotional creatures.
So, when young men find themselves in the grip of strong emotion, its kind of an "oh shit, whats going on with me" reaction.
He's inexperienced, he doesnt really know what love is, all he knows is he likes you alot and its one of the strongest things he HAS felt and he's probably hoping that thats what love is.
Basically, what it says is that you're slightly more emotionally mature than he is (which is pretty normal below... well if youre the same age below about 25)
Be honest with him. Tell him that its your first relationship, and you aren't even sure what love feels like. You want to know that whats going on in your head actually IS love before you say it (because thats just important to you) and it is obviously going to take you a while to figure it out, so please be patient.
Follow it up with reassurance. "I like you alot. Don't think that I don't like you that much. I just want to be sure of myself"
Something like that. He could be a bit insecure, so make sure he knows you are still very interested in him and want to get to know him more.
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Whatever you do, don't say you love him if you don't because (I know from experience) that will leave you dissatisfied and eventually things will fall apart because it feels like you two have nowhere else to go. The fact that he tells you he loves you so early doesn't necessarily say anything about him:
1. He could be telling the truth and he has fallen for you already.
2. He could be just trying to be really sweet and please you in anyway, not really thinking about the implications of what he's saying.
3. He could be making it up just so you will swoon over him, and hopefully make the relationship move along a little quicker (this would be a player).
Next time he says that, I would suggest you say that you are appreciative, and you are lucky to have him- however, you aren't sure of your feelings yet and you want to be totally honest with him. Remember, you aren't obligated to return the "I love you" just because he said it, and it's only been two weeks so it's not unreasonable either.
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Hi,
I think you are right to go with your instincts on this one. It is almost impossible to know if you're in love with someone after only 2 weeks of going out.
I think the best way to go about it is to tell him just that; of course be thoughtful of his feelings. Sometimes when things are new and going well in a relationship, we can confuse love with infatuation. Sometimes it's hard to tell the difference even with adults.That's probably what he is feeling. He is perfectly normal and you can probably take it as a compliment.
However, I would tell him that although you enjoy his company and like him very much, you wouldn't want to say that you're in love yet. Tell him that you want to take things slow and get to know each other a little better and maybe there will be love in your future.
Good luck,
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He might be a player. But I don't know him, so i can't really say accurately. But the next time he says that, just be like, i'm really confused about my feelings right now, but I really do care and like you. And thats telling him you like him but not sure if you 'love' him
-E
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