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Trapped in hell
My life is, to me, a living hell right now.
Backstory will be neccesary. Ive lived with my girlfriend for over a year. I love her, and we've tried to make it work through alot of trauma.
But I'm sick of it. I am sick of her. I want to leave her, and I can't.
By can't I mean functionally can't. My credit is shit, partly because of my parents back blading me and forcing me to pay debts incurred under the promise of them paying them off and then refusing too later. Partly because I ruined what little I had left spending money on her, helping her out, I even paid for a semester of her school.
I have only a few good friends in my life and while most of them WOULD help me, none of them can. I don't have any friends who could cosign (hell, half of them can't sign for a lease without a cosigner themselves) so I am completely incapable of getting my own apartment.
The worst... I just moved. Four hours away from all the friends I have in the world to another city. I don't know anyone here, we moved to be closer to her parents and family and the support they can offer her (and through her, me)
So now I am in an unfamiliar city with no credit, no ability to get an apartment, no car (the one we share is in her name and is hers)and little money (I just got a job here as a server, but I'm still in training)
And so I don't know what to do. The apartment is in her name. She can kick me out legally if she wants to. I have no where else to go. I am completely trapped in this, and while I don't think she WOULD kick me out (she'll keep trying to make it work) I don't have a refuge of my own.
If I weren't Christian I'd be contemplating suicide right about now. Thats how far down this has taken me. As it is, I'm almost to the point of leaving all my stuff, this apartment, and her, and just going be homeless to get away from it. I literally have no other options.
Help would be appreciated.
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you're in kind of deep right now, but if you can hold out for a little while longer, i'm sure you can come up for air soon.
while you're still with your girlfriend, open a savings account, and put any money you can into it. before you know it, you'll have accumulated interest, and you'll have money you need for a downpayment. honestly, if you don't want to be home a lot, you could try to pick up a second job. it'll give you more money, and you won't have to be there a lot.
as for a car, look for something cheap that someone's selling by-owner. if you can't find anything, the bus is always an option.. not a great one, but beggers can't be choosers.
take your religion, and have faith that things will work out. don't ask for things to be easlier, just ask to be stronger. suicide is really a permanent solution to a temporary problem, and it would hurt your family, no matter how much you think they hate you.
being homeless would be harder than the situation you're in now. and once you're there, there's usually no turning back.
so keep your head up, and take your faith and go with it. i'm sure you'll be okay, just keep trying. that's all you can do right now.
good luck, let me know.
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Hey, ya it sounds like you are in pretty deep, but you always have to look at the positive side of things no matter what life throws at you. You shouldnt have to rely on your parents all the time. Independance will get you far as well.
At least you have a place for now, and while you do you should try accumulating more money so that you could find yourself a place to live on your own such as an apartment in case something ever does happen. Not every place is expensive and you dont need all the accessories. There are jobs everywhere if you find the one you have isnt working for you, you just have to do a little searching. Concentrate on you, because you are what is most important right now, not anyone else.
Mostly all i have to say to help you is basically save up your money, budgeting is important, spend it very wisely, making your own homecooked meals will save you loads (you could make a large meal and store in containers so that it is easily accessable), STAYING POSITIVE is THE KEY, and eventually Everything Will Work Out for the best :)
Hope I helped ;)
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