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MY BEST FRIENDS A LOSER!
i ahve a best friend, but she's a slut, and i have tried to talk to her about it, but she doesn't care, and shes really meann too. and when we fight shes always like, you're a slut, and such a bitch, when its the other way around, and she doesnt think shes a slut, she talks behind the girls' at school who do that stuff too behind theirr backks, and she doesnt even realize shes doing half the things she does, and it gets on my nerves! please helppp! :[
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Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
You call her a best friend. And what's even more unbelievable is that each quality you listed about her was negative. What traits does she possess that is positive? If the bad outweighs the good there are many things to consider about her.
Calling you a bitch and a slut does not make the situation any better. You're going to become more negative beacause of her overly confident mind. Generally when you surround yourself with people who only say negative things or do negative things you only hurt yourself by becoming negative as well. Try finding people who are very open-minded, accepting, and have a positive outlook on life and you'll find yourself improving and being more happier.
You need to find a new best friend. Seriously, you need to think of yourself better than that and not tolerate her behavior and actions.
If you are going to keep her around I wouldn't be as close as you are with her now.
1. Don't take her shit: She must feel like she's more superior and better if she talks down on you and other people. Sadly, people like this thrive on bringing you down and using your kindess to their advantage. You, on the other hand, have the intelligent to not become a follower and to do your own thing. You know who and what you are, ultimately that's the most important thing. Don't let her get to you. If she sees you feeling hurt or sad she's winning at her own game.
2. Talk to her: Tell her you don't agree with what she does and you expect her to know that your not going to follow her. When you talk to her be firm and informative but don't yell. You're the more mature one here. Explain to her that if she doesn't want your help you won't help her. But ask that she listen to what you have to say. You deserve that much at least. And if she doesn't care about it then that goes to show you what kind of person she is.
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Sounds to me like it may be time to cut her loose. Maybe she needs to see what life would be like without you in it to help her?
It's also very important to realize that when anyone you know.. EVER in your life-- talks behind backs often, they are more than likely doing the same thing to you behind your back.
Is that the kind of friend you want? Someone who calls you a bitch and a slut? Where is the respect in this friendship? If talking to her got nowhere, then I'd leave it at that. Know that you're better then petty things, and that you don't deserve to be treated that way.
As for her slutty/bitchy ways?.. That's not your problem. If those are the characteristics that she wants to turn towards, then that's something she'll learn to settle for. It sounds to me like she might have already gotten used to the terms. You aren't responsible for changing her, or making her better. Those are decisions that she has to make by herself, if or when she is ready.
Best friends don't do this to each other... she needs to realize that.
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Since you've already tried talking to her, I would say there's nothing you can do to change her. Looks like she's pretty set on her ways.
If you wanted to, you could just not be her friend anymore, which may be easier said than done, but still. It doesn't sound like you guys really treat each other as friends anyway, calling each other sluts and bitches and all.
--Jack
(16/m)
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