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best friend vs. girlfriend
16/f
so i'm kind of confused about my sexual orientation right now, but i think i'm bi and i think im in love with my best friend [who is a girl].. i told her about it, and she said she was fine with it, but she didnt feel the same way. she said she only loved me as a best friend, but nothing more. i went to visit her in california for a week and at first we would be really affectionate towards each other. like we would hold hands and cuddle a lot. sometimes she would bite my ear and i would kiss her on the cheek. then one day, i just asked her if i could kiss her, and she said i could. so ever since then, we would make out like all the time, but we would try to hide it from our other friends. the thing is, i asked her if she loved me, like if she was "in love" with me, but she said she doesnt know. she just said she knows she loves me, but not if she's IN love with me. so i just said okay. but then i also asked her if she was bi, and she said "i dont know. only with you i guess.." so i dont know. it's so confusing...when i came back to new york, she would tell me she missed me and stuff and she wanted me to come back..the thing is, i really dont know how she feels about me. she makes it seem like the thing that happened between us while we were there was nothing to her because she does it with other guys; like theyre not even together or anything.. and more recently, it seems like we're not as close anymore. like we dont talk on the phone as often, and when we do, there's a lot of silent, awkward moments. i dont know what to do.. how can i tell if she loves me more than just a friend or not at all? do you think she's just in denial or not?
i'm so sorry it was long. i really need help though..thanks.
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i think she's just as confused about her sexual orientation as you are. the reason she's doing things with other people just might be because she's trying to figure things out for herself. you just have to wait it out. talk to her about it. ask if she has done anything with any other girls.
and if you're in different states, you have to think about long distant relationships.
good luck with everything.
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Shes probably just as confused ask you are! She might be thinking alot of her sexuality. Thats why she might be kissing other guys, just trying to figure out who she is, if shes bi, or a lesbian, or striaght. She might be thinking if it was just a one time thing, or if it was really something magical. And she also might want to keep it on low down becuase she doesnt want anyone to know. And antoher thing is she might worry what her family would think if she told them. You should give her a little time, but confront her also and tell her how you feel. And shes probably not in denial, just confused about everything. She could just feel a sexual attraction for you and not other girls.
- Hope you & your friend work out (=
love,
Nikki™
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