|
boyfriend not circumsized
My boyfriend and I have been together for a long time and I love him to death, but when it comes to the bedroom, I don't know what to do. Basically, he isn't circumsized, and all the other guys I've dated are circumsized.
I don't want to sound mean, but I am completely unattracted to his penis. When we do sexual things together, I don't even like to look at it. I feel horrible when I say that, but it's true!
I've looked into getting him circumsized and the procedure is simple. Many men who have gone through the procedure left comments saying that they're glad they got it done.
What do you think I should do? Persuade him into getting it circumsized..? I am clueless. :(
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
I understand it's different for you, but if I'm being honest, this seems quite selfish.
Just because you like circumcised better isn't a good enough reason for him to jump at the chance and do it.
It's a touchy subject to bring up. Personally, I wouldn't bring it up. I'm sure, as a male, he knows what circumcision is and how there are no real benefits of having it done.
There are risks entailed - as with all surgery, as well as emotional/physical pain. Would you really want to put him through this because of his unsightly penis, in your opinion?
Not to sound rude, but there could be things he doesn't quite like about you, but I doubt he would go to extreme measures and tell you to have surgery and change yourself.
You could certainly ask him his views on circumcision, but don't expect him to want to do it.
If he's happy with how he is, then you should be too.
You should also learn to like it. Having a foreskin isn't the end of the world! You could even find ways it can benefit you.
]
If I were you, I would not suggest this to any male.
Suggesting he get circumcised would be similar to him suggesting you get a boob job. It is simply not okay to suggest someone go about cutting up their body because of their partner's preference. I can't imagine how you could say it without it being offensive.
Although circumcision is socially acceptable and mostly harmless, it is genital manipulation and is not recommended by doctors even for infants. The most prominent medical associations in Canada, US and Australia have all taken the official position that it is not necessary and has no significant health benefits.
The complications possible in adult male circumcision more serious then an infant as well and there is a definite possibility that your boyfriend could loose some sensation.
I'm not sure where you were reading these testimonials, but they sound a little one sided to me. I've known men with botched circumcision personally, and I would not wish that on anyone. Try the Wikipedia article on circumcision even, for a more objective perspective.
If your boyfriend was actually concerned about this, I'd urge you to be supportive with HIS interest in changing his body, but since your main concern is an atheistic one, I'm afraid you need to consider that your problem to deal with, and perferably without making him feel inadaquate.
If he has a cleanliness issue, by all means talk to him about THAT! Unpleasant smells or tastes need to be addressed for his own sake as well as yours.
]
Don't try to persuade him, try asking him rather nonchalantly, "Have you ever thought about getting circumcised?" After he is done wincing from the thought of the pain, maybe he'll say yes and open the dialog with you. There are pluses to it, the penis becomes less sensitive and he will last longer during sex.
Plant that thought in his head, maybe he'll look into it after you do.
]
More Questions: |