|
confused boyfriend losing interest
Everything was great on Monday. My boyfriend was really sweet, as usual. He hugged me, kissed me, told me nice stuff..and i felt really nice around him. It's not love, but it could be.
Anyway, i knew stuff at home wasn't great for him...his mom and him fight a LOT soo..i never bothered asking him cause he'd get REALLY ticked off when i gave him advice or inquired about it. So Tuesday comes and he begins to ignore me. Like as if i'm not there. Just completely changed. I thought about it...and decided that maybe he needed some space or something...perhaps his mother made him really upset...so i ignored him too.
It was then that he suddenly spoke up, claiming that he was really confused and everything was a blur in his head. I noticed how depressed and upset he got in just two days. His face was all..bitter...and he didn't smile or anything.
It was as if he lost interest in me. He then asked me if i would be completely devastated if we broke up. Of course, i said yes..we've been together for four months and it's a pretty big deal...and it just makes me SO SAD that there could be a chance that he's suddenly losing interest in me.
However, i don't know whether he's confused about EVERYTHING right now. It's all unclear and he still claims to be confused and feeling depressed and crappy and horrible.
I don't know what my next step should be. I haven't dealt with this before. Has this happened to anyone? Why would he be confused all of a sudden just out of the blue like that?
=(
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Hello,
Yes, I have had something similar happen to me when I was 20. My boyfriend of 8 months became suddenly confused about things and had issues to deal with. I gave him his space. A few weeks or so after we split, I ran into a mutual friend who said "I just want you to know that I think you are much classier and better for Marcus than that trashy blonde he's with now." I was devastated. I loved him beyond any love I had known.
After we split he kept coming around me. He kept saying he loved me but..... and would never say what was bothering him. I knew he had moved on to another girl, but why did he keep returning to me in this confused state? He complained of his life being a blur and not being able to eat. He ended up feeling weak, depresses and anxious because he wasn't sleeping at night. Turns out he had cheated on me, a one night stand, and she ended up pregnant. His friends influenced him and he made a mistake that cost him his true love. I saw him several years later at a fair. he had the cutest little blonde boy with him. He was alone, just him and his son. I hope he and his family are well.
This may or may not be the case with you. The point is that whatever he is dealing with is stressful enough for him to remove you from his life. Weather he has interest in you is irrelevant if he is trying to do the right thing by someone else. If he doesn't give clear answers, or gets angry easily when you want to know what is wrong, then he is not being honest about things. If that is the case then you are better off without that in your life. If he cannot be honest with you then you need not waste your time with him. 4 Months is long enough to know if he is good for you or not. Sounds like the issues he has with his family will pour into your relationship if you stayed together anyway. Guys and their moms have a special relationship that will never come before you. He sounds as if he is one of those guys. The truth is that you will NEVER be happy with this guy and you would always be fighting or competing for attention with his mother.
Even though they fight, he will be the first to defend her if you disagree with her about something. Usually when someone is in the state of mind he is in, it is better to leave him alone to resolve his issues himself. You will only get hurt if you continue this relationship. The best thing for you to do is think about what skills you want to learn this summer and go get a job in that field. Save up all your money and go to Europe for your birthday next year. Concentrate on yourself and you will only become a better person. Before you know it, you will be attracting successful, money making guys that do not have issues in life. This may take you a long time but it will be well worth it when you are out on your own and paying your own bills.
If you need to talk or just let some frustrations out please send your thoughts and feelings our way. We are here to empower you and help you.
Although, this guy and his family may just be eating the wrong foods. Depending on the blood type there are foods that cause the symptoms he's complaining about. Mood swings, confusion and lethargy. Although he is tired he cannot sleep either. Foods can do that also. He needs to change his diet and start telling the truth about everything.
-- Stay Honest
]
he may just need to get things in his life dealt with and taken care of. if he needs that space let him have it. as long as hes not rude or mean you can still be there for him and if you guys are meant to be he will come back to you when hes ready. but dont sit around waiting for him. talk to other guys. i dont mean get a knew bf in a week but talk to other guys and hang with your girl and guy friends and stuff. dont sit around waiting for him but let him know your there for him and really want to help him. tell him if theres any way for you to help him you will-as a girlfriend or a friend. he will like that you care that much and it will make him happy.
good luck and i hope i helped :)
HiChick
]
You are both 16. These things happen. If he is going through something right now and needs his space, well them give it to him. If he wants to break up and you say no you are holding him emotionally hostage. No one likes their captor. Let him go. If it was as good for him as it was for you he will be back. If not you will learn from this situation and be a better person for it.
]
More Questions: |